A little whimsy today on Grandmother and Grandaunt clocks. Do you own one?

I have decided to buy a Grandmother clock! You mean you have never heard of a Grandmother clock. Why should this concept seem strange? Particularly in this day of equal rights and political correctness, maybe clocks should be more neutral or maybe we should create a Grandmother clock, at least in the interest of fairness. I was curious if anyone else had thought of the idea of a Grandmother clock or if I was just a “Johnnie come lately” so I looked up Grandmother clock on the Internet. I found over 28,000 hits and the following definition: “Grandmother clocks are usually considered to be a smaller floor clock measuring 80 inches or less. Grandmother clocks are perfect for smaller rooms, hallways, landings and smaller foyers.” I even found Grandson and Granddaughter clocks.

The next question I had was “how come I have never seen or heard anyone talk about Grandmother, Grandson and Granddaughter clocks?” Oh well, that’s a question for another day. It’s nice to know that everyone can have a clock. Do you suppose uncles, aunts, nieces and nephews, not to mention father and mothers also have clocks? Well, go ahead: “Make my day and look it up on Google.” Go ahead and tell me that I am really out of step. I suppose there are clocks for names too; like John clocks and Peter clocks and Mary clocks and Emily clocks. Maybe that could be a line of business: “Name clocks.” Each type would be somewhat different and would be unique to the individual name.

My John clock would be made out of diamonds, platinum, gold, rubies and sapphires. It would be ten feet tall and would tell analog time. The numbers on the face would be diamonds, rubies and sapphires. The hands of the clock would be silver and the pendulums would be made out of solid gold. The case would be made of ebony and the face of the clock would be made of non-endangered ivory. My clock would always run fast. Can you design a clock for your name? What would it look like and what would it be made out of? Would it run fast or slow?

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