Quandaries of My Existence
I am having one of those days; when the questions of life that I have never been able to answer just seem overwhelming. I once looked forward to the day that I would know almost everything or at least know a great deal more than I did. Sadly, that day has retreated further and further from my grasp. Each day that I live, I find more questions that I cannot answer. So today, I am listing some of these in the hopes that you (my reader) may have found some of the answers that have eluded me. Please feel free to answer any of these questions in the comments section or send me an email with your answer. Any solutions will be greatly appreciated. For those of you who have never read my blog before, I am a 76 year old White guy who lives in the USA. I love lobster, liquor, reading, music, travel and making it difficult for racists, xenophobes, Trumpers, and other bigots to dominate current narratives.
Here then are my major quandaries:
- I grew up always feeling like I was old. I never felt like a child. Now I am told that I am old, but I do not feel old. How can I never be young or old?
- Years ago, I thought that I was smart and that I knew a great deal about the world. Many years have gone by. I have studied and read much. I have attended years of education and completed many programs. How come today, I do not feel like I know much at all?
- The older I get, the less that I understand people. I had people all figured out years ago. Today, I can’t even figure my self out.
- It was said that if you are not a socialist when you are young, you do not have a heart and if you are not a conservative when you are old, you do not have a brain. Well, something must be wrong with me, because I still believe in the merits of socialism.
- I never wanted to be young. I have always been more comfortable around older people. Trouble is I never wanted to be old either. I truly wonder if there is any age that I would be happy at?
- I have never discovered the meaning of existence, a buried treasure, or the secrets to success. I have looked high and low. Seems like I would have found something by now.
- My father used to say if “If you are so smart, why aren’t you rich.” I still don’t know the answer to his question. My father thought he was smart, but he died poor as well. I guess, “Like father like son.”
- Money never mattered very much to me. I wonder what my life would have been like if money had been my holy grail instead of time. I always admired the grasshopper in the story with the ants. I could never save for a rainy day as much more followed the precept to “eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow I might die.”
- What if I could live my life again. Knowing what I know now. Would I have a better life if I could live it over again? Somehow, I doubt it. This conclusion puzzles me. Maybe its like the time paradox thing. You can’t go back in the past and change the future.
- My greatest heroes were always thinkers rather than doers. I think Hofstede’s book “Anti-Intellectualism in American Life” should be for thinkers like the Communist Manifesto was for the proletariat. “Rise up Intellectuals and overthrow the morons of the world!” God knows there are enough of them.
- Why did none of the officers on the Star Ship Enterprise have seat belts? Every other episode they are in a photon battle with Klingons or Romulans and they are tossed hither and zither all over the deck. Four hundred years in the future and they still do not have seat belts? This show was a harbinger of our future. God Forbid It!
- I have made many friends and lost many friends. Friends seem like ships in the night. Why do they come and go? Am I the one that changes, or do they? I read Aristotle’s books on friendship years ago hoping that they would help. Did he leave out some important information?
- Was Socrates really the smartest person in ancient Greece? Seems like the Delphic oracle would have been, but she was not counted because she was a woman.
- How do so many mediocre writers sell so many books? People who find a blasé character that is some dumb action figure and repeat the story over and over again with a slightly different title. The hoi polloi buy hundreds of these books making the authors rich and making us listen to them on endless talk shows.
- If I die and there is a heaven and I go to it, will I have to listen to God lecture all day long? I have never liked long lectures and I have been told that we must listen to God in heaven. I suppose I could take him or her for a few minutes but all day?
- If I go to heaven, will I have any chores to do? Lots of other questions on the sexual side about heaven but I don’t want this blog to get an X RATING so I will leave them to your imagination.
- Life’s not fair. Parents told me that when I was five or so. Now that I am wiser, I still have never given up expecting it to be. Is there anyone out there who really expects life to be “unfair?”
- Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise! BULLSHIT! PS: Maybe it works for women.
- The early bird catches the worm. Great if you like worms. Just a few examples of some of the useless sayings we hear as we grow up. This leads me to my three rules for aphorisms.
- Three rules that I have learned from aphorisms, 1st For every up there is a down. 2nd For every pro there is a con. 3rd For every rule there is an exception. But if there are exceptions for every rule, then that means that these three rules are all false. How confusing!
- Do not go gently into the night, rage, rage and drag your feet when they come to take you to the nursing home. It probably won’t do you any good, so you will need a backup plan. In a future blog, I will give you a plan for avoiding getting dragged off to a nursing home. If I can come up with one.
- Whoever said that death and taxes were the only eternals was a big schmuck. If I started a list of “eternals” it would go on for many pages. Taxes get a bad rap. You want roads? You pay taxes. You want police protection? You pay taxes. You want education for your kids? You pay taxes. So why are so many people complaining about taxes? Maybe they should pay for these things out of their weekly checks and see how they feel about that.
That’s it folks. I am sure that with more time devoted to it, I could add endlessly to my list of quandaries. Each day brings more and more of them. I would love to hear your Quandaries of Existence. Please feel free to add as many as you like in my comments section. Perhaps other readers will have solutions to your quandaries. If there are any Socrates, Marilyn Vos Savants or Solomons out there please give us the benefit of your wisdom. 😊
Aging Capriciously 
Mar 05, 2023 @ 01:40:37
Quandary … perplexity… uncertainty…. hmmm
overthinking? 🙂 maybe… take a deep breath, inhale and whooosh it all out? then go and have a piece of chocolate?
I enjoyed reading this blog, I can somehow relate … 🙂
LikeLike
Mar 05, 2023 @ 08:10:35
Thanks Lin, I suppose spending in bed with the flu this week, I have had too much time to think. John
LikeLike
Mar 05, 2023 @ 08:10:10
Oh, John! Your existential cry is breaking my heart. My possibly imaginary Friend heard it before you even wrote this post. I love you, Bro.
LikeLike
Mar 05, 2023 @ 16:19:39
Thanks Majik, Here is an old Irish blessing for you.
May good luck be with you Wherever you go, and your blessings outnumber the shamrocks that grow. May your days be many and your troubles be few, May all God’s blessings descend upon you, May peace be within you, May your heart be strong, May you find what you’re seeking wherever you roam.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mar 05, 2023 @ 17:47:30
I’m making my Guinness Irish stew with Guinness soda bread and Guinness corned beef & cabbage with pints of Guinness to wash it all down for St. Paddy’s Day! You and Karen should come to Yuma and feast The Great Saint with us on the 17th! ☘️😎🥰☘️
LikeLike
Mar 05, 2023 @ 19:50:30
Sounds Yummy, I will be going to the Dentist in Algodones on the 17th but I need to stay overnight in Mexico. It is not firm yet, but perhaps we could swing by on Saturday the18th. I say its not firm because I am trying to change my dental appointment to the 17th but I need to call the office on Monday to see if that day is open. With my wife’s schedule we usually need to get back the next day but the 18th is Saturday and we have nothing going on. John
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mar 05, 2023 @ 20:41:16
SOUNDS GREAT! Let’s make it a date! Sure and begorrah, it IS! My Karen and me can’t hardly wait to meet your Karen and you! 😎🥰❤️☘️
LikeLike
Mar 05, 2023 @ 23:07:30
I will get back to you after I have called my dentist tomorrow Majik. I hope she can do Friday. John
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mar 06, 2023 @ 10:56:50
HI Majik, I was able to change my dental appointment to Friday the 17th. We will stay overnight in Algodones and leave Mexico via border early on the 18th. Early for Karen being around 10 AM. My phone number is 612-310-3803. We could meet you guys for lunch around 11 or 11:30 AM in Yuma. Any place that you like would be great. I am sure you know Yuma better than I do. John. my email is persico.john@gmail.com. Easier to call or text rather than go through wordpress.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mar 05, 2023 @ 08:38:24
“It was said that if you are not a socialist when you are young, you do not have a heart and if you are not a conservative when you are old, you do not have a brain. ”
Conservatives would say that. An alternative second clause might be, “If you are not a conservative when you are old, your heart survived.” There are plenty of old socialists — and plenty of brainless conservatives.
LikeLike
Mar 05, 2023 @ 16:17:59
Thanks AJ. I will remember this wisdom. It is better than believing the “old saying.”
LikeLike
Mar 05, 2023 @ 18:38:05
LOL. John, these quandaries are hilarious. So this is the way your mind works when you have the flu, eh?! First of all, I love your brief description of yourself. You’re doing a fine job of making life difficult for racists, …, and other bigots. Good work! And that’s quite a quandary, worrying about whether you’ll have to do chores or listen to long sermons in heaven! I just read a joke on another blog post this morning about a little boy who hoped he’d go to heaven because he knew his brother wouldn’t be there. He didn’t know about the possibility of chores! Other thoughts: speaking as a woman, I have NEVER enjoyed getting up early or going to bed early, EVER; and I 100% agree with you about taxes! Great post. I hope you’re feeling better soon. Too much warm weather down there in AZ, perhaps?! 😏
LikeLike
Mar 05, 2023 @ 23:18:40
Thanks Jane, Interesting story about the little boy. You and Karen would get along great. She is a night owl and I am a lark. “Early to bed” she has heard me carp on too many times. I say it just to give her a hard time. I think I am 90 percent better now. I took two Covid home tests over the past week and tested negative each time. I keep wondering when I will get Covid. I have had two shots and three boosters and a yearly flu shot but it did not stop me from getting this miserable cold or flu or whatever. Thanks for your concern. By the way, did you read the story I wrote about the little boy who believed in God. Another one I think you might like is about a woman in a nursing home. I think you read that one though about the woman looking out the window and waiting to die. I wrote the following about six years ago. Trying to write something different and more fictional.
https://agingcapriciously.com/2017/06/05/the-little-boy-who-believed-in-god/
Anyway, hope things are going well for you in Canada. I miss working up there. The people were always so friendly and it did seem like a much saner country than the US of A. John
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mar 06, 2023 @ 11:16:39
I just read your article about the little boy. I wish you had had a larger readership then; I would love to have read many comments. You gave an excellent response to your main commenter. Re Canada, I do believe that Canada is a saner place, although, as we have all learned, it doesn’t take much for things to go off the rails. I am distraught to realize how easily so many people are willing to follow nasty, lying, self-serving leaders based on what? Fear of “other”?
Glad you are feeling better.
LikeLike
Mar 06, 2023 @ 13:13:48
Thanks Jane, I wrote many articles back when I had many fewer readers. I think of reposting them and occasionally do but life seems to short to go backwards so I keep finding new things I would like to write about. I think the writing class I took with Dr. Wedin was very helpful in terms of creativity. It is hard to believe that we keep reelecting the same lying leaders. John
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mar 05, 2023 @ 22:45:46
I completely understand the feeling of being overwhelmed by the never-ending questions of life. As a fellow human being, I too have pondered over questions that seem to have no answers. It’s interesting to read about your personal quandaries and I appreciate the honesty with which you have shared them.
I believe that the quest for knowledge and understanding is a lifelong journey, and we should never stop seeking answers to the questions that baffle us. However, I do wonder if there are some questions that are simply beyond our understanding as humans. Have you ever come across a question that you feel cannot be answered, no matter how hard you try?
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, and I look forward to reading more from you in the future.
LikeLike
Mar 05, 2023 @ 23:06:31
Hi Frances. Thank you for taking the time to comment. I wrote this last blog somewhat but not entirely facetiously. In my life, I have encountered many questions that I think have no answers. Dr. Deming used to describe “The Unknown and Unknowable.” I am not sure whether or not time can play a role in these questions or just that human cognition is not up to the effort. If you think about the limits nature plays on our five senses in terms of touch, smell, taste, sight and hearing, I would guess that we have some cognitive limitations on how we think and perceive. My definition of a God if there is one, would be “all-knowing”, omniscient. I think we may only see 1/1000 of any spectrum concerning thought and awareness. Many questions like who made us or why are we here, if there is a why may be well beyond our limits to understand or determine, in my opinion. John
LikeLike
Mar 06, 2023 @ 16:03:17
John, At the heart of existence lies mystery and paradox. There are no simple answers. Maybe just asking the questions is enough…
LikeLike
Mar 07, 2023 @ 11:59:34
Barry. I agree. I think we should be training young people to question, question, question. More important to ask questions than to provide formulaic answers. The following quote was attributed to Einstein.,
“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day.”
—From the memoirs of William Miller, an editor, quoted in Life magazine, May 2, 1955;
LikeLike
Mar 06, 2023 @ 20:23:26
Hi John,
You have certainly started a snowball rolling here gathering mass as it grows.
I love your writings and your outlook on life, especially the ageing part. I think our quandaries multiply as we age, at least for some of us, with a little more time to think about the strangeness of life and of course always the big WHY!
I just came back home from spending 10 days with 3 of my grandkids aged from 11-15 and two working parents. Both parents and kids are fully involved in work, school, sports, recreation and living thus leaving little time to query the quandaries of life. However, I would have a little time each day to marvel at their energy, inquisitiveness and zest for life and marvel at the changes that life brings. None of us, I think, are immune at times to wondering what if, why me and is there something else beyond our knowledge.
I know for me that especially when I get out at night in the country and really see the cosmos I do get to wondering much more than usual. At those times I really can question both the idea of a god or a big bang but of course never get an answer. This is not to say I believe in the god of the bible as I don’t. However, it is still hard to believe all this started by chance but then when I come back to “reality” and see what is happening in the world I am fully convinced nobody could be stupid enough to design this!
So keep thinking and writing dear man!
LikeLike
Mar 07, 2023 @ 12:02:49
Hi Wayne, I am jealous. My six grandchildren have all grown up and gone their separate ways. I once thought of starting a “Grandparents for Hire” group for the weekends. I take your grandchildren and you pay be besides. What a deal. One of the reasons we did not move into a gated community was so that we could live with people like you describe. Young, old, Black, Brown, White, and not just retired. People still living in the world and interacting with more than just golf courses. Here is a quote I like attributed to Einstein.
“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day.”
—From the memoirs of William Miller, an editor, quoted in Life magazine, May 2, 1955;
LikeLike
Mar 07, 2023 @ 12:29:31
Yep definitely understand the gated community thing. We visited friends in a gated golf community in Florida for a couple of weeks in early January and sterile is a good description.
We live in a small university town so certainly appreciate the different ages and ethnicities and love the fact we can walk downtown without being afraid.
I can never understand anyone who isn’t curious about life.
LikeLike
Mar 08, 2023 @ 07:12:18
Exactly my feeling Wayne. I lived in a small university town called River Falls, Wis, a number of years ago. Lived two blocks from downtown. Still miss the town. It had a little bit of everything. Not to many small university towns in Arizona. John
LikeLike