December 29th, 2014

We have 3 kerry roper time waits for no mandays to contemplate the year of 2014 before we begin a New Year.  Perhaps, it might be useful to think of the time we have lost in arguments, grudges, misunderstandings and not wanting to say “I am sorry.”  We go on with feuds and squabbles and time keeps fleeing.  We think that perhaps we can make up for lost time, but making up for lost time can be bittersweet at best and at worst an impossibility.  Time waits for no one.  (Forgiveness song by Matthew West)

“Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come.  fWe have only today. Let us begin.”  ― Mother Teresa

I have a daughter who has not talked to me for many years now.  I think of the time that has gone by and how we could have spent it together doing things we could never have afforded to do when she was younger.  I think of how as adults we could and should have become good friends with talks by the fireplace and walking in the woods.  She is over forty now and I am nearing 70 and the clock keeps ticking and ticking.  I think of the minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years that keep moving on by, each moment lost forever to us as this blanket of silence and anonymity shrouds our lives.

“They say time heals all wounds, but that presumes the source of the grief is finite”  ― Cassandra Clare

time_waits_for_no_man___tattoo_design_by_mortar_girl-d67o35cTime is lost forever, or can it be made up?  What if she suddenly decided that she wanted to have a relationship with me?  Could we make up the lost time?  If we started today to try to get to know each other; imagine the events that have changed our lives, the places we have been to, the books we have read, the movies we have seen, the funerals and weddings we have been to, the jobs and careers we have changed, the grandchildren we have helped raise.  So much that has changed each of us.  Could be ever bridge the gulf that now separates us?  Would it be possible to be close to each other or even love each other?

“Unfortunately, the clock is ticking, the hours are going by. The past increases, the future recedes.  Possibilities decreasing, regrets mounting.”    ― Haruki Murakami

It is difficult to imagine making up lost time, nevertheless, few of us would not try if given the opportunity.  It is an opportunity full of promise but also anguish.   We think we can go back to where we wanted to be years ago but while we are trying to make up the lost time, forgive1we feel anger at the waste of time that could and should have been prevented.  It might be water under the dam, but it will always seem like a useless expenditure of time and energy.  I have known brothers and sisters, parents and siblings and former friends who did not talk to each other for over fifty years.  Unfortunately, some of them died and there went any possibility to make up for lost time.  There are no guarantees in life and if you choose to waste time or lose time, perhaps you will never be able to make it up.  It might be too late when you finally realize your mistake and ask yourself WHY?  You will be left with regrets about what might or could or should have been.

“Any time not spent on love is wasted.”   ― Torquato Tasso

Perhaps you have no control over your lost time.  Time spent in jail, time spent recovering from an accident, and time spent in a relationship that was wrong may all constitute lost time.  Lost time is time away from ForgiveHeart-Jessica_Keylife that could have been lived much differently.  It is time that could have been spent more productively and happily.  Can this time be made up?  Better to not lose it in the first place.  But if you have lost it, then do your best to get on with your life.  Live each day the best you can.  As they say with money, don’t throw good money after bad.  Do not throw good time after bad.  The lost time is over and you have the rest of your life to live.  If you can live each day the best you can, you will be able to put the lost time behind you and perhaps even forget it someday.  Then again, maybe the time that was lost was a lesson and you needed to hear the message it was sending.  A good friend of mine was fond of saying: “There are no mistakes in life only lessons to be learned.”  I think of this comment often.  It is a good lesson to remember.

Time for Questions:

Do you have any lost time to make up?  Are you currently losing time that you should not be losing?  Have you thought about how you can stop losing this time? What can you do today to make it up?  What might you feel regrets about someday if you do not change your life today?

Life is just beginning.

Start now.  Don’t wait.  Tomorrow may never come.

 

 

How Could Life Be So Unfair or Why Did Richard Cory Get All the Luck?

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I curse the day I was born.  I curse my father.  I curse my mother.  I curse my sisters and I curse my brother.

   Oh, I wish that I could be, 

Oh, I wish that I could be

Richard Cory.

 I curse the life I am living.  I curse my name.  I curse my shame.  I curse the day I came.

 Oh, I wish that I could be,

Oh, I wish that I could be

Richard Cory.

 I curse my poverty.  I curse my mediocrity.  I curse my inability.  I curse my fate and my biology.

 Oh, I wish that I could be,

Oh, I wish that I could be

Richard Cory.

 No doubt many of you will know Richard Cory.  For those who don’t know him formally, I am sure you know him personally.  He is that person we all want to be.  He is rich, famous and good looking.  He is popular, likable and a wonderful human.  He is on everyone’s list of most:  most eligible, most likely to succeed, most likely to be president, most likely to be remembered.  We all know a Richard Cory.  We all have someone we dream we could change places with.

The papers print his picture almost everywhere he goes: 
Richard Cory at the opera, Richard Cory at a show. 
And the rumor of his parties and the orgies on his yacht! 
Oh, he surely must be happy with everything he’s got.

Oh, I wish that I could be, 

Oh, I wish that I could be

Richard Cory.

Why did God forget me?  Why was I not born wonderful, magical and fantastic?  Why does everyone else get the breaks?  What does he/she have that I don’t have?  Why couldn’t I be rich?  How come I am not famous?

 Oh, I wish that I could be, 

Oh, I wish that I could be 

Richard Cory.

Life’s not fair.  It has never been fair.  What did I do to deserve this kind of a life?  Why did I get a bunch of losers for friends and relatives?  If only things had been different.  I never had a chance.  It’s not right.  Everybody was always picking on me.  Even Mom and Dad never really liked me.  I hate everyone.  If only I could start my life over again.  Things would be different.

I curse the heavens above.  I curse the purgatory where I may go.  I curse the hells below.  I curse the places that might exist but none alive will ever know.

 Oh, I wish that I could be, 

Oh, I wish that I could be 

Richard Cory.

 What might I have been if things had worked out differently?  Where did I go wrong?  Why did fate deal me a stacked deck?  Why did so many bad things happen to me?  Why Lord? Why?  Why did thou hate me so much?

 Oh, I wish that I could be, 

Oh, I wish that I could be

Richard Cory.

Maybe you know how this story ends?  I worked in Richard Cory’s factory.  I had a wife who loved me and three young children who grew up healthy and happy.  I lived to a ripe old age.  I died in my sleep one night surrounded by my loved ones and several good friends.  I was never rich in material things but I was blessed with an abundance of spiritual goods.  I did not realize how many blessings I had until the angel took my hand to take me away.  I tried to speak out then and bless everyone for being so kind and loving to me, but it was too late.  The angel said that it was always that way with humans.  We think everyone has it better than us and that the grass is always greener next door.  I only wish I knew then what I know now.  I hope it’s not too late for you.

And he was rich – yes, richer than a king –

And admirably schooled in every grace:

In fine, we thought that he was everything

To make us wish that we were in his place.

So on we worked, and waited for the light,
And went without the meat, and cursed the bread;
And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
Went home and put a bullet through his head. 

Some of the lyrics above are taken from Simon and Garfunkel’s Richard Cory, while some are taken from the poem “Richard Cory” by the original writer Edwin Arlington Robinson.  This poem was published in 1897.  The lyrics in the song differ from the lyrics in the poem. 

 Time for Questions:

Why did Richard Cory kill himself?  Do you ever covet your neighbor’s wife?  Why?  Have you ever cursed the life you have?  Why?  What blessings have you been given that you most commonly ignore or take for granted?  Why?  Are you happy?  Why or why not?  If not, what would make you happy?

Life is just beginning.

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