I woke up this morning and told Karen that while she was at church, I was going to write an un-blog. She looked puzzled and wanted to know if that meant I was not going to write a blog. I said “Of course, I am going to write a blog but it will be an un-blog.” “Well,” she said, “What is an un-blog?” I replied that it was like an un-birthday party. I actually did not have the slightest clue what it was or could be but I knew that today I was going to invent an un-blog. With no templates, I would have to invent it as I went along. I did not bother to Google “un-blog”, so you will forgive me if I reinvent the wheel. (Actually after I finished this “un-blog”, I did Google the term to see if I was a “Johnny come lately” or had really invented something new.)
There are several reasons that I come to the point in my blogging where I now know that I need to write an un-blog. First of all, many of you are probably tired of my advice, admonitions, critiques, complaints, exhortations, etc. about the state of the world and its many problems. This week alone, I found over five million problems that needed solving in the pages of CNN, MSN, FOX and BBC news. My best guess is that the number of problems we face in the world has steadily escalated since I was born. Thus, despite my efforts and other bloggers like me, the number of problems just seems to keep growing exponentially.
Well, being the strategic planner that I like to think I am, I took out my handy “world problem solving software.” I programmed it to prioritize the “greatest” problems this week that I could solve with my exorbitant ego and unlimited resources of advice and solutions. I must have had low batteries because my screen suddenly went blank and it started flashing “I quit, I quit, I quit.” Perhaps it was a virus or some type of Trojan? I immediately turned it off. This has now created a dilemma. How can I pick the single most important world problem to solve, if my software is malfunctioning? Would my many followers (considerably less than George Takei) accept me simply choosing a great big humongous problem and solving if for them and the rest of the world?
No! This would not be fair to you my faithful readers and followers. You will only accept me going after the biggest baddest problems out there selected scientifically and with great forethought. You expect me to solve these incredible problems with shrewd insight and analytic ability. You want me to provide solutions that would make Solomon humble. You expect me to solve only the most critical problems facing the world. Simple selection would never do for my followers. Knowing these facts, I felt lost and confused. With millions of problems out there and my software on the blink, I was like Garry Kasparov trying to win against Big Blue Computer. I am only human; the stress is unbearable at times. Thousands of followers, (well maybe a few hundred) depending on my blog each week for advice and succor!
In truth again (Never trust anyone who says “in truth” or “trust me”) I could not select a single problem this week to tackle. I am weary of solving all of the problems in the world. The burden has become too great. Simply perusing my blogs, you will note the number of critical world and USA problems that I have already solved this past year. To make matters worse, to date, I have not received one penny for my efforts or even an invitation to the White House. I have not been knighted or given the Profiles in Courage award either. Perhaps, I missed the phone calls from Obama and the Queen. I must remember to check my voice mail more often or at least my text messages.
It is very frustrating. No matter how altruistic I am, I crave some simple recognition. It is a lot like being a superhero but no one knows it. What is the point of having super-powers if no one is there to applaud idealize and worship you? I can accept that a few of my miraculous ideas and solutions might have been slightly off mark, but I cannot accept that all of them were. Furthermore, please go to my first blog site where I have posted over 600 blogs dealing with various and assorted issues affecting the world. See if some of these blogs don’t bring tears to your eyes or joy to your heart. (You can find them at www.timeparables.blogspot.com) All of these issues has led me this week to create the world’s first “un-blog.”
It is my considered but humble opinion that in an un-blog, I (the Blogger) should not solve any problems. A typical blogger writes their blog either to solve problems or to give opinions and advice. It is not fair, that you the reader (The Bloggee) get all this free advice and give nothing in return. It is only right that in an “un-blog”, you the reader and faithful follower, should be the ones to solve the problems and give me advice. It is time to pony up. How many of my blogs have you commented on? How many have you disagreed with? What have you taken a stand on? What has stopped you from being an “un-blogger?” It is your turn to pay me back for all the solutions and advice I have so freely and graciously given to you. Think of your world without my blog. As the walrus said in “Alice in Wonderland”:
“The time has come,” the Walrus said,
“To talk of many things:
Of shoes–and ships–and sealing-wax–
Of cabbages–and kings–
And why the sea is boiling hot–
And whether pigs have wings.”
I would love to hear your take on “What are the biggest problems the world faces.” I would really like to hear what you think. (See my questions below.) Send me an email persico.john@gmail.com or post your replies in the comments section. Speak out. Today is your chance to be an un-blogger. It is your golden opportunity to help solve the many problems facing the world or to at least offer some advice on what you think those problems are. Perhaps, your brilliance and erudition might be discovered on my blog and you will be invited to the White House. (Please do not hold your breath.) If you do get invited, please, please take me along.
Time for Questions:
What are the biggest problems you face in your life? What are your solutions? What do you think we should do to save the world? How can we deal with apathy and those that do not care? Where do we start? Should we have major political changes in our constitution? How could we get these? What would you like to see changed in the world or even just in your home town? What does Persico mean “Life is just beginning?”
Life is just beginning.
I finally broke down and looked up “Un-blog” on Google. Here is what I found.
https://www.wordnik.com/words/un-%20blog
Sorry, no example sentences found. Related Words. Log in or sign up to add your own related words. Wordmap. (beta). Word visualization. Comments. Log in or …
I think this means that there are no definitions. I can thus claim the distinction of being the first “un-blogger” on the internet. Or perhaps my readers and faithful followers who have answered my questions should be the first to receive this distinction.
Here is my definition of an “un-blog.”
“A blog site where the readers post opinions and solve problems and the blogger simply listens and does not weigh in with advice or solutions. A place of introspection rather than extrospection.”
Aging Capriciously 