Aging Capriciously

Defying Time: “Renowned astrophysicist Stephen Hawking to turn 70 Sunday despite being diagnosed with a crippling muscular disease when he was 21.” (January 6, 2012)

I saw the above headlines this weekend and along with many people who have known of the work of Dr. Hawking, I was stuck by the enormity of the accomplishments of the man in the face of what should have been the biggest barrier in the world to ever achieving anything. Dr. Hawking has Lou Gehrig’s disease and is a quadriplegic who lives in a wheelchair and cannot move his arms or legs or even speak. I thought of the comment by Ben Franklin that we should all either do something worth being written about or write about something worth being done. Dr. Hawking and his life surely merits worth being written about. However, it is somewhat coincidental that I was thinking about two other “elderly” people who also merit attention. With this headline in mind, Defying Time, I have decided to write a series this week about people who have defied time. I will start with Dr. Hawking and each day this week I will post a brief blog about another person who has defied time and reflect on the message that they and their accomplishments have for us. First: A brief list of Dr. Hawking’s accomplishments:

Awards and honors:
• 1975 Eddington Medal
• 1976 Hughes Medal of the Royal Society
• 1979 Albert Einstein Medal
• 1981 Franklin Medal
• 1982 Order of the British Empire (Commander)
• 1985 Gold Medal of the Royal Astronomical Society
• 1986 Member of the Pontifical Academy of Sciences
• 1988 Wolf Prize in Physics
• 1989 Prince of Asturias Awards in Concord
• 1989 Companion of Honour
• 1999 Julius Edgar Lilienfeld Prize of the American Physical Society
• 2003 Michelson Morley Award of Case Western Reserve University
• 2006 Copley Medal of the Royal Society[50]
• 2008 Fonseca Prize of the University of Santiago de Compostela
• 2009 Presidential Medal of Freedom, the highest civilian honor in the United States

This list does not mention that he has published a book called “A Brief History of Time” that has sold over ten million copies or that he has dozens of papers and films that he has either authored or contributed to or that he has fathered 3 children and been married twice or that in 2007 he completed a zero gravity flight at Cape Canaveral. He has even acted in several TV shows in which he has played himself. My short list of his accomplishments barely brushes the surface of what Hawking has accomplished in his 70 years on this planet. Most people with Lou Gehrig’s disease die within a few years of their diagnosis. Stephen has survived and with little doubt prospered despite the crippling disease. He is honored, respected and admired the world over.

If ever anyone had an excuse for giving up on life or even hating life, a person diagnosed with Lou Gehrig’s disease surely qualifies. I have had some personal encounters with the condition as my wife took care of a patient (Carol) for several years who had this disease. My wife Karen is a nurse and she would do a shift several times a week with a family in St. Paul who had contracted with her for nursing care for their invalid daughter. I would occasionally go over with Karen and spend some time visiting her and Carol during the evening after work. Carol was also a fighter and she demanded as much independence as she could get given the confines of the disease. Think about not being able to move or walk or talk and about the dependency that you would have on everyone for any of your needs from breathing to eating. Carol was on a respirator and could not even breathe by herself.

For many of us our independence is the most important factor in our lives. From the time we are infants to the time we die, we all want to live a life of independence and self-determination. Imagine the struggle to continue to live, if you had to forego any such notions of independence. It is difficult to imagine even surviving much less accomplishing anything under such conditions. In fact, many of us would probably say we would rather be dead than to live with these disabilities. Facing such incredible barriers to living, anyone wanting to be dead could surely be forgiven.

What can one say for a life like Stephen Hawking has lived? Is it grace, self-determination or simply a miracle that he has overcome his disabilities to give back to humanity much more than he has been given himself? How many of us go through life with our petty excuses for not accomplishing anything or even trying anything? I don’t have the time! I don’t have enough money! I don’t have the patience! I am too old to start anything now! If only I were younger!
Dylan Thomas has a poem which I like and occasionally use as an inspiration for myself, it goes like this:

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rage at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

So take a minute today to think about Stephen Hawking. Take a minute to think about what you may have given up on or what you may have used as an excuse for not starting something. Do we really owe humanity anything? Does it matter? What do you owe yourself? What barriers do you need to rage against? Do not go gently into that good night.

What would a blog on Time be without some predictions for the New Year? Herewith are my 3 predictions for the New Year. As you may have already surmised, they will all concern politics. I will give you my predictions and then a brief explanation as to my underlying assumptions. Feel free to take the poll that I am attaching to this blog and let me know what you think. Scroll to the bottom of these blogs and you will find two quick polls.

Prediction:

More money will be spent on the 2012 political campaign than has ever been spent before on any election. Mitt Romney will emerge victorious as the Republican candidate.

Assumptions:

1. The Republicans will not sacrifice their desire to see President Obama defeated merely to appease the more conservative sector of their party. We have already seen the “Tea Party” favorite Bachman drop out with little support.

2. Money talks. Mitt has more money than anyone else and his funds will feed ads that will continue to sway voters. In auto racing land, they say “Win on Sunday, Sell on Monday.” In politics land, it is “Advertise on Sunday and numbers change on Monday.” A true testament to the fickleness of the American Public. Also amazing how many people I know who say they make up their own minds and that ads have no influence over their choices.

Prediction:

The 2012 Congress will make the 2011 Congress look good. This will be the most acrimonious partisan get nothing done congress in the entire history of the USA.

Assumptions:

1. The Republicans will do everything they can to deny President Obama any chance to look good or to accomplish anything.

2. Obama will be viewed as a lame duck with the approaching elections and will need to spend more time trying to get re-elected then fighting for any bills or changes.

3. The Democrats will see no need to compromise for fear of associating too strongly with a president who might just become more unpopular or unseated.

Prediction:

President Barack Obama will narrowly win reelection to a second term.

Assumptions:

1. Even without the efforts of a “do nothing” congress, the economy will continue to get better and jobs will grow taking much pressure off of Obama.

2. The majority of Obama’s policies have been to benefit the American people and the majority of the people will realize that he has not been pushing special interests to benefit friends and family.

Well, there you have it. In black and white, I doubt I could be more specific. Unlike horoscopes, tea leaves and crystal balls, I have set my theories down and am open to being either right or wrong. You will find few talking heads who will so commit themselves to concrete specifics as I have now done. It will be interesting to look back on these predictions in 12 months and see how they fare.

Time consuming generally means something that takes a great deal of time. To consume means to eat, so something that is “time consuming” literally eats our time. Have you ever made a list of time eaters? Probably they will be different from time wasters. We know that time wasters have little or no value, However, time consumers may have a lot of value but they still take a great deal of time to accomplish. It is time consuming to paint your house, find a new babysitter, complete your B.A. degree or write a book. Nevertheless, none of these things is a waste of time. There are so many time consuming activities that we could do and that would add value to our lives. Some wise man once said, anything worth being done will take time. And of course, how many times have you heard, “Rome was not built in a day.” I was amazed to read that Truman Capote spent ten years writing and researching his novel in “Cold Blood.” It simply astounds me that someone could spend ten years on such an activity. Of course, his effort was well worth the time spent.

While we know that anything worth while will take time, it is generally more of a logical thing that we know in our heads. Our heart is telling us to hurry up and lets get it done. We want it now, not in a thousand, hundred or even a few years. It is a testament to the patience of humanity, that we have built so many great things that could not be done overnight. Dr. W. E. Deming used to counsel that “people expect instant pudding.” He meant that any major business improvement would take time and could not be accomplished overnight. Nevertheless, we battle our impatience daily and it sometimes seems a battle we start at birth and continue to death. Witness, the tantrums of little children which later become the impatience of adults unwilling to think long-term or willing to destroy the environment for a few more seconds of prosperity.

How can we get over the hurdle that these large consumptions of time present? We have so many things do to; it is hard to spend a large amount of time on any one activity or effort. Time consumers bog us down and force us to ignore other time activities that may be screaming for our attention. How long should we invest in one activity? How can we tell when a time consumer really will be worth the effort? Is there any way to measure the value of time consumers? Perhaps, the power of Faith is the only measure that we have when it comes to making a long-term effort and finally reaping our rewards?

If I could save time in a bottle,
The first thing that I’d like to do
Is to save every day till eternity passes away,
Just to spend them with you. – Jim Croce (Time in a Bottle)

How often do you want to spend time with someone, but it just passes away? Then you think that you wish you could have saved time and spent more of it with the person then you had. We have all had the experience of knowing someone who has died and during the funeral we regret that we did not spend more time with this person. The saddest stories are those of friends and relatives who have not seen each other for many years and then meet at the passing of a loved one and mourn the time that they lost or did not spend together. If we could only have put that time in a bottle.

One morning I woke up and went out about my daily activities. I came back about 10 AM and Karen was still not up. I went into the bedroom and she was turned over and quite still. I looked closer and she did not appear to be breathing. I was in a near panic and my heart started to race. I gently shook her and then shook her harder. She turned over and asked me what was wrong. I started to cry. I was shaken to my core. I had never thought of her just passing away like that and suddenly the possibility was a reality. Each day now one of my goals is to spend some quality time with Karen. I try to start the day off by asking what I can do for her today or how I can help her. I mark off on my goal chart this activity so that I can remember how important it is.

No matter our best efforts, time just passes away and we never spend the quality time you are hoping to. The problem happens because we are living in the future and not in the present. In the present, time is a gift that we have and we can not save even a single minute. When we live in the future, we are worried about tomorrow and we are not concentating on what we are doing now. Can you imagine having a good love expereince, if you were thinking about your work or what you needed to do later? The more we can put ourselves into the moment, the more we live our lives today. Take each moment, savor it and live it to the fullest.

So who can you spend more time with this week? Who have you been putting off seeing because you had no time? Who would you cause you the most regrets if they died and you had not shared another moment of eternity with them? What is more important today then spending time with them?

Do you know the difference between Wisdom and Knowledge? You can spend your entire life trying to gain more knowledge and you will become a very intelligent and thoughtful person. However, no amount of time spent can make one wise. Wisdom is not found in journals, textbooks and the local library. Wisdom does not necessarily come with age. Our greatest prophets did not have degrees and most of them were recognized as wise men at a very early age. Jesus and Buddha were both in their 30’s when they started their ministries. As we begin the New Year, here is a bit of wisdom that I picked up from a book called “The Path of Love” by Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh. I think this passage from his book has a great deal of relevance for our current economic situation.

“Unless there is more than enough, man will always be exploited by man; it is not a question of communism or socialism or capitalism. Unless there is more than enough, man will be exploited. So create more than enough, be creative, use all possibilities to create more: that is the first thing. And the second thing: live in the present, don’t think of the morrow. Listen to Jesus; he says: Look at the lilies in the field. They spin not, they weave not, they labor not, they don’t think of the morrow – yet they are beautiful. Even Solomon arrayed in his whole glory, was not so beautiful. Live in the present. The future creates greed, greed creates hoarding, hoarding creates poverty.”

There are two points of wisdom here that are very clear. 1. Create. 2. Live in the present. The third point is more subtle but it is there. The third point is share. If we create but we hoard, if we create but we worry we will not have enough for ourselves, we create a greedy society. I dare say that since the 1970’s, the culture of America has become imbued with an ethic of greed and materialism. Many assume that it is capitalism itself that is evil or wrong. As Bhagwan notes, it is neither capitalism nor socialism that is wrong, it is a system of poverty and exploitation that is wrong. Capitalism affords us the best means of creating more for all. However, capitalism alone does not insure that everyone will have enough. There must be a spiritual component to our efforts that allows for charity and generosity.

As we start this New Year, I hope we can all think more about creating abundance and sharing that abundance with others. What can you create this year that you can share with others? What can you do to live more in the present and worry less about tomorrow? What does it mean for you to be generous and charitable to others? How can we all worry about having less stuff and sharing more with others?

January – the beginning of a new year. As we start this New Year, I want to share with you some statistics from Bloomberg’s Business Week “2012 Year in Review”.

+ Since 1981,the number of people living in extreme poverty has declined from 50 percent to less than 20 percent in the developing world.

+ Infant mortality across the world is down.

+ The number of girls attending school is up.

+ Teenage pregnacies are down.

+ The chances of anyone dying in a war have never been lower.

+ In 2012, each person was born into a world that is richer, healthier and safer than at any point in history or time.

OH! and please note that the world did not end on December 21st, 2012.  We are safe for at least another year.

Take these statistics to the doomsayers and hate mongers and parasites that want to destroy the world. Show them to those who are against progress and change and science. Recite them to all of your friends and coworkers who may be wont to wallow in their current problems and are blinded to the big picture. Put them in your pocket and whenever anyone starts with the “good old day” please pull them out and ask them to be more specific.

I have never been known to be a “Pollyanna” and I am often the most pessimistic person in the room, but I know in my mind and sometimes in my heart that today is the best day in the world and tomorrow will be an even better day. I know this not because it is a fact, although it is for many in the world, but for me it is a choice. What I do, what you do with your time this year of 2013, will determine whether this year is a bad year, fair year or great year for you.

For many beginning a New Year, this is the time when we make new resolutions and promises galore. A time to begin over and to make dreams and wishes come true that did not work out the year before. We bring in the New Year as a new born baby, full of promise and youth. Some critics look at the trail of broken promises from bygone years and laugh at the efforts of others. Such people disregard the possibility of hope and change. Yes, we are better this year than we were last year and we will continue to grow and change and look at the folly of our past lives. If we believe in the future and believe in ourselves, we will make 2013 an even better world than it was in 2012.

Hope as they say springs eternal in the human breast and what would we be without it? We need to try again and when we fail, try again. The only failure is when we stop trying. So I say: “Disregard the naysayers, go ahead and set some new goals and new dreams. Stretch your vision and your horizons. People do not perish because of their dreams; they perish because of a lack of dreams. My dream for all all of us in the coming year is for even more peace, more health and more wealth. We can and will create a world where the visions and dreams of all can be fulfilled.

Out with the old and in with the new! New Years! The end of our past and the beginning of our future! All over the world, we count down the minutes and then seconds until a New Year begins. A New Year represents a finish and a time to put failures and bad dreams behind us. New Years day is a new beginning. We pray and hope that each year will be better than the last. Curiously, we celebrate this ending with a night of wild parties and much drinking.

Do you ever wonder why so many people get drunk on New Years Eve? Is it simply to forget the past or is it to celebrate the past? How many New Years days have been ruined before they even got started? Tonight we drink, tomorrow we make promises about how different our lives will be and what changes we will make. Each New Year is a time of magic. It is a time of possibilities. We think it will mean great differences in our lives, but how long do these commitments usually last? Go to the health clubs on New Years day and the parking lots will be full. By early March, the parking lots will be back to their normal contingent of cars. The landscape will be littered with failed promises and failed New Years resolutions. Some may think that they can escape this debacle by simply not making any resolutions. Instead their failures simply remain with them day after day because they were afraid to even start.

Thankfully, we have 365 chances each year to start our life anew. You don’t have to wait until New Years day to begin. Every tomorrow is a new beginning. The only failure in life is to give up. Each time you fall down and get up again you are a success. Each day that you make a new commitment to try, you are a success. Each time your commitment lasts a little bit longer than the last time you are a success.

You have two more days until the New Year of 2012. What are you going to do with your life? What issues, goals, problems, tasks, challenges or quests should you spend more time on? Who do you need to spend more time with? Who do you need to ask forgiveness of? Who do you need to forgive? What do you need to let go of? Sharing our lives with others is the greatest success of all. Good Luck and happiness in the New Year.

The Master of Time – A Time Master is someone for whom Time is no longer in control of their lives. They have taken control of time. A true Time Master can jump forward and back in time as they wished or simply choose to live in the present. I have presented many different perspectives on time over the past year. After looking at time from these perspectives have you come to any realization about what time means to you and about how you can control your own time? Is time under your control? Is time simply in your mind? Is time an independent external phenomenon?

I believe the answer is yes to each of the above questions. Time is a manifestation of our mind’s ideas about the world, space, matter and motion. What we see as the movement of time around us exists in physical space as changes in the world, changes in nature and changes in our bodies. The thoughts in our heads are reflected on these changes like the shadows in Plato’s cave. We see and understand time as a set of reflections that are echoed by the beliefs we have about these changes. For example, my hair starts to turn gray and I say I am getting “older” and perhaps “wiser.” The leaves turn and I say it is “autumn” when it becomes time for “Halloween and Thanksgiving.” New technology replaces the old and I say it is “progress.” The changes keep on happening and I apply society’s labels to these changes. My own ideas are married to the ideas in our culture about time and thus reflect tradition as well as learned beliefs about the meaning of these changes.

Control the ideas you have about time and you control time. You cannot stop the changes but look at the changes without the labels and what do you see? Can you look at the changes without applying labels and ideas about time? Perhaps not, but if you can look more objectively at these changes, then my musings may help you to see time somewhat differently. The promise to become a “Master of Time” is still a challenge that you face.

The way to master time is to master your thoughts. Change your thinking and you can change time whenever you want to. Are you getting older or simply more wrinkled? Is life moving faster and faster or is it the transportation by which we get around which propels us faster and faster? Do children age faster or do they simply change in ways that are new to our generation? Is the world better today or worse than 100 years ago? The answers to these questions will depend on your beliefs about time. Have you learned to think about time differently? Have you become a “Master of Time?” Do you want to have another year of my blogs on Time?

Are we getting close to the “end of time” or just the end of the year? Have you ever really thought about when time would end? The Mayan Calendar says it will end next year on December 21, 2012. I guess many can be glad that they will be able to celebrate 12-12-12 before the end of the world. Will time end when the world and the universe end? Or maybe time will just quit, like a watch that stops running.

Some religions believe that time ends on judgment day. Do you think that there are any clocks in heaven? What about hell? Does the devil track time for us? What about Purgatory? “Purgatory (Lat., “purgare”, to make clean, to purify) in accordance with Catholic teaching is a place or condition of temporal punishment for those who, departing this life in God’s grace, are, not entirely free from venial faults, or have not fully paid the satisfaction due to their transgressions.” (New Advent Catholic Encyclopedia, http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/12575a.htm ). The Catholic Church teaches that we need to spend time in Purgatory for certain offenses. Since the punishment is temporal and not eternal, do you suppose they have clocks in Purgatory? Who do you suppose winds them up? Can you imagine spending 500 years in Purgatory and watching the clock until you are released?

Perhaps, time will wear out when people get tired of keeping time. We have explored hundreds of ways to think about time in my blogs this past year. People have been thinking about time since the first human beings walked the earth. Time seems to be part of the human psyche. If humans did not have time, they would certainly have created it. It is hard to imagine anyplace where we would not mark time. I notice I can always find new ideas about time to keep adding to my blogs. I have a whole list of subjects that I am working on for future blogs, of course, that assumes I make it past 12-21-2012. But if I go to heaven, can I keep my blog going up there?

Heaven qualifies as one place though where there would seem to be no reason to mark time. Why keep track of time when everything is eternal and unchanging? Heaven must be a place where there are no goals, no accomplishments, no meetings, no places to get to, no tasks to complete, no projects due, no emails to answer and no shortage of time. If any of these things existed in heaven, then we would need to track time. So what do we do in heaven? We all seem to want to get there, but what do we do with our “time” when we are there? I guess we just play all day since play does not require us to track time. Play is by definition “timeless.”

Can you think of anything else that does not require us to mark time? Perhaps if we could just play all day, then time would end. Would little children invent time? Children do not seem to worry about time as much as adults. What if we played more and worked less? Could we cut time down some? Do we “end time” when it is just play time? As adults we become more and more fixed on the idea of time and the limitations that time places on our lives. Our goal orientation makes time a reality for us.

Maybe we should create a “holiday” each year where time stops. A day when you do not have to keep track of time or when time does not matter. It is difficult to think of living a single day when we are not keeping track of time. I guess you will just have to wait until you get to heaven for time to stop. Do you suppose anyone wears watches in heaven? When was the last time, you were able to forget about time? How long did it last? What does it take for you to forget about time?

Making up for lost time can be bittersweet. I have a daughter who has not talked to me for many years now. I think of the time that has gone by and how we could have spent it together doing things we could never afford to do when she was younger. I think of how as adults we could and should have become good friends with talks by the fireplace and walking in the woods. She is over forty now and I am past 60 and the clock keeps ticking and ticking. I think of the minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years that keep moving on by, each moment lost forever to us as this blanket of silence shrouds our lives. Time lost forever, or can it be made up? What if she suddenly decided that she wanted to have a relationship with me? Could we make up the lost time? If we started today to try to get to know each other; imagine the events that have changed our lives, the places we have been to, the books we have read, the movies we have seen, the funerals and weddings we have been to, the jobs and careers we have changed, the children grandchildren we have helped raise. So much that has changed each of us.

Difficult to imagine making up lost time, nevertheless, few of us would not try if given the opportunity. It is a bittersweet opportunity because we may feel joy at the opportunity but also anger at the waste of time that could and should have been prevented. It might be water under the dam, but it will always seem like a waste. I have known brothers and sisters, parents and siblings and former friends who did not talk to each other for over fifty years. Unfortunately, some of them died and so did any possibility to make up for lost time. There are no guarantees in life and if you choose to waste time or lose time, perhaps you will never be able to make it up. It might be too late when you finally realize your mistake and ask yourself WHY? You will be left with regrets about what might or could or should have been.

Perhaps you have no control over your lost time. Time spent in jail, time spent recovering from an accident, and time spent in a relationship that was wrong may all constitute lost time. Lost time is time away from life that could have been lived much differently. It is time that could have been spent more productively and happily. Can this time be made up? Better to not lose it in the first place. But if you have lost it, then do your best to get on with you life. Live each day the best you can. As they say with money, don’t throw good money after bad. Do not throw good time after bad. The lost time is over and you have the rest of your life to live. If you can live each day the best you can, you will be able to put the lost time behind you and perhaps even forget it someday. Then again, maybe the time that was lost was a lesson and you needed to hear the message it was sending. A good friend of mine was fond of saying: “There are no mistakes in life only lessons to be learned.” I think of this comment often. It is a good lesson to remember.

Do you have any lost time to make up? Are you currently losing time that you should not be losing? Have you thought about how you can stop losing this time? What can you do today to make it