Aging Capriciously

Do you agree with the universal bit of wisdom that the truth will set you free?  If you accept this axiom, then the problem becomes how do you find the truth?  What is the process or road or path or algorithm or method that we can use to find this elusive ineffable quality of life?  Anyone who has searched for the truth knows that there are many obstacles to finding it.  If you think Odysseus had a rough journey on his voyage home, it is nothing compared to the voyage you will need to take if you seek to find the truth.

The route to the truth is strewn with more pitfalls, dangers, villains, liars, thieves, and hazards than any other path in the entire universe.  If you take up this journey, you will find mirage after mirage of illusions, hallucinations, phantasmagoria, apparitions, fantasy, and chimeras all screaming that they are the truth.  The truth if it exists at all will be cloaked in a web of deceit and pretense.  The Internet will have ten million sites where you can find the truth.  Religious experts, psychologists, economists, historians, forensic scientists and lawyers will all tell you that they know the truth.  Every huckster and expert and authority will offer to sell you the truth for no money down.  You can buy the truth with cash, labor or your soul.  All you have to do is believe.  Believe in someone.  Who to believe in is the next question?

“The internet is full of crap.  For every piece of reputable information you’ll find countless rumors, misinformation, and downright falsehoods.  Separating truth from fiction is equal parts a mental battle and diligent research.”  — Thorin Klosowski

Most of us want a simple solution to a simple problem.  Unfortunately, most of our problems are not simple and most solutions end up being quite complex.  When we start looking for the truth (I am not talking about inner truths here. That is another process.), we soon find that our truth has more facets than the Hope Diamond.  Most truths are like a kaleidoscope.  They are not only quite multifaceted but they keep changing.  Depending on when, where and how we look at a truth, it will seem to be very different.  Let me give you an example.

I have always been fascinated with Lawrence of Arabia ever since seeing the movie with Peter O’Toole and Omar Sharif.  When I was young, he represented a perfect example of a shining hero.  T. E. Lawrence was ethical, brave, intelligent, charismatic and someone who would stand up for the underdog.  He was everything I could ever hope or aspire to be.  As I became older and read more about Lawrence, I found that many other people did not share my opinion of him.  I found some who called the movie version of his life, a complete fantasy.  To others, he was a closet homosexual who exaggerated his exploits and his role in the Arab revolt.

“Lawrence suffered greatly as a result of the conflicts and contradictions in his nature. He craved fame, yet he hid himself and hated public ‘lights’; he was timid and feared his fame, fearing above all that others would realize his desire for it. This and his love of self-aggrandizement made him write things which had little to do with the reality of Revolt. I think, he was by nature inclined to exaggeration too; and as far as I could understand from John Mack’s psycho-analysis, this was due to the inferiority complex which Lawrence always felt since he was a young boy, and which started when he learned that he was an illegitimate son and that his parents had never married.” —- T. E. Lawrence: true and false (an Arab view) — Lucy Ladikoff

So now I had a dilemma?  Who was the real Lawrence of Arabia?  Was he a hero or a charlatan?  I decided to read even more about him so that I could answer this question and find the truth.  I selected over a dozen books about Lawrence written by an assortment of writers.  Some of these authors did not think much of Lawrence.  Some idolized him.  One or two tried to present the Arab perspective.  I read through each of these books searching for the truth about Lawrence.

I highly recommend this process for anyone who is searching for the truth.  I used this same process about two years ago when I was researching the issue of immigration in the United States.  I read over a dozen books on immigration.  Some were pro, some were con and some tried to be factual.  I have written three blogs summarizing my findings on this issue.

I must warn you though that if you want to replicate my process for finding the truth you will encounter the following problems.  First, the number of books or papers on any given subject is beyond most of our abilities to read in a lifetime.  Second, the veracity and credibility of any particular expert is difficult to determine.  Third, every expert will have his/her own set of biases.  For example, relatives of Lawrence loved him.  His superiors were more skeptical about him and Arab authors wanted to tone down his role and build up their own role in the revolt.  How do you know who to believe or even if belief is the real issue?  Perhaps, truth is like a kaleidoscope and all viewpoints have some value.  Truth may simply be a matter of perspective and where you are standing in the universe.

“There are no facts, only interpretations.”  — Friedrich Nietzsche

My friend Dick says “what is the point.”  It seems that no truth can be found in history or science or anywhere else.  To paraphrase Ecclesiastes, it is “all futile, nothing but futile.”  Why search?  Furthermore, our search for the truth is complicated by the fact that new evidence and concepts and theories will continually emerge about any subject that you are studying.  Each new concept can change your idea of the truth.  If you accept my logic, you have the foundation for little but skepticism concerning the value or ideal of truth.  Why search?

I can only answer this latter question with the same reply that Mallory gave when asked why he bothered to climb a mountain.  “Because it is there!”  Perhaps this response seems like a cheap trick or an evasion.  No doubt anyone of a logical nature would like a more profound or at least erudite answer.  I promised a method for searching for the truth.  I have suggested a method.  The problem is that I cannot guarantee that my method will help you to find the truth.  I do not know of any other method that will render a better result with less effort.

There are other strategies for finding the truth that are simpler but they are also much more dangerous.  You can trust an authority.  You can rely on someone else’s opinion.  You can try to find a simple answer in a book.  Each of these methods is problematic and to some extent irresponsible.  Too many of us have been taught to trust the experts or that simple answers to complex problems actually exist.  No doubt, there are times when it is necessary to trust others.  However, there are many times when you must think for yourself and make up your own mind.

I find the best solution is to regard each expert as a single data point in a universe of data points.  I try to look at as many data points as I have time to.  If a pattern starts to emerge from my perusal of a number of data points, I might suspect that I am looking at some version of the truth.  An inquiring mind should always regard such truths with a high degree of skepticism.  The truth you find today may turn out to be tomorrow’s lie.  Remember the unsinkable Titanic.  “The ship that even God could not sink.”  Truth is a lot like the Titanic.  It only takes one iceberg to send it to the bottom of the sea.

Time for Questions:

How do you find the truth?  How effective has your method been?  How do you know when you are being conned?  Who do you trust to tell you the truth?  Why?  What truths are you still searching for?  Why?

Life is just beginning.

“When others asked the truth of me, I was convinced it was not the truth they wanted, but an illusion they could bear to live with.”  — Anais Nin

No time for justice! Some people do not believe that there is any justice in the world.  Others believe that justice will always occur but it just takes time.  Martin Luther King said that “The moral arc of the universe is long but it bends towards justice.”  I remember part of another quote that mentions justice grinding like a mill wheel, slowly but inevitably.

Many believe that justice will not be found in this world but only in some after life when all accounts are called to order. There they will find St. Peter at the gates to Heaven deciding who gets in and who goes to hell.  The Old Testament notes that “Vengeance is mine, sayeth the Lord.” Perhaps, we will not find justice on earth but somewhere between heaven and hell, we will all be judged and sentenced.  I have always wondered where Hitler and other mass murderers would end up and what criteria St. Peter could use to judge them.

In the USA, the Bill of Rights (Amendment VI) calls for a speedy and impartial public trial for all convicted of a crime.  Justice is rendered quickly and you do not have to wait to have justice meted out.  Justice is fair and impartial.  It does not depend on how much money you have or who you know.  Or at least, it is supposed to be fair and impartial.

Today the wheels of justice seem to grind far more slowly than envisioned by our American forefathers.  Few of us would say that most trials are speedy, never mind impartial.  Witness a former President who has had ten warnings for Contempt of Court and at best has received some minor fines.  How many warnings would you or I have been given before we would have been locked behind bars.  Perhaps if the definition of a “speedy” trial had been defined we might be better able to judge the efficacy of the present US court system.  What is speedy to some of us might be slow to others.  Perhaps ironically, Trump’s lawyers are not looking for a speedy trial but just the reverse. They feel that time is on their side and the longer that they can avoid a trial the better things will be for them.

No doubt we all want justice today for ourselves. Why then does it appear that few citizens are clamoring for trials to be made speedier?  Is the right to a speedy trial no longer important?  Are we more willing to tolerate delays in all aspects of our lives?  Have we extended this to the court system so that we no longer feel that a speedy trial is important?  Are the lawyers dragging the system out to benefit their pocketbooks? 

Maybe we should just rewrite the Bill of Rights to make the amendment more accurate.  Perhaps it should read:

“You are entitled to a trial, which with lawyers and court delays might take several years before it comes to court.  If you can afford a better lawyer, you will have a better chance of winning your case.  If you are rich and privileged or have power and influence, we will make sure that your trial is fairer than others.  Money and influence will also guarantee that you will be able to afford bail so that you will not have to sit in a damp grungy ugly jail cell for several years before your trial begins.” 

What would you think of this change?  Do you think trials should be speedy?  Do you think it is important to have a fair and impartial justice system?  Would you agree that rich influential people should be entitled to more privileges than poor nobodies?  How would you feel if you were in the court system today?  Would you be a satisfied customer?

I wrote this blog eleven years ago.  I started to review it and realized that much if not most of my data was now obsolete.  Nevertheless, in many ways, not much has changed with our law enforcement system.  People are still afraid to walk the streets of most large cities at night.  Gun violence is at an all time high.  School shootings and other mass killings are no longer sporadic events.  You can almost set your watch or smart watch to determine when the next mass killing will occur.  There is also the unpredictability of our Officers of the Law in terms of dealing with potential offenders.  I am sure that there are many good cops, but the number of egregious offenses by those assigned to “Protect and Serve” is appalling.  Hardly a day goes by that the news does not describe an event where some minor offender is shot down for not complying or understanding how to deal with the police.  

WASHINGTON, D.C. — “Forty percent of Americans, the most in three decades, say they would be afraid to walk alone at night within a mile of their home. This indicator of crime fears last reached this level in 1993, when, during one of the worst crime waves in U.S. history, 43% said they would be afraid. Between that year and 2021, an average of 35% of adults have feared for their safety within a mile of home, with the annual results ranging between 29% and 39%.” — Personal Safety Fears at Three Decade High in U.S. by Lydia Saad, 11/23

I encourage you to read my blog from eleven years ago.  See what you think?  Post your opinions?  Is anything better today?  Do you feel safer on the streets today than you did ten years ago?  What would you change in the system if you could?  What do you think needs to be done? 

And I think I will keep you here,
deep within my heart.
Today…tomorrow…forever…and a day! (From Forever and a Day, by Cindy Heavican)

Poems can tell us a great deal about the feelings associated with time. Forever and a day! What a beautiful thought. When we marry someone, our thoughts are like in this poem. Our dream is that our love and our happiness together will last long after our earthly bodies have withered away. Poems and stories are full of tales of love that have somehow transcended time. Some of these stories, like Romeo and Juliet, are now timeless themselves.

We would all like to think that our love will last forever and a day. We marvel at those people for whom this seems to hold true. We may know a special couple who never seem to tire of each other and who are always loving and caring towards each other. Perhaps your father and mother have been married for sixty some odd years and still seem like newlyweds. Or friends who despite the longevity of their marriage treat each day as though it was the first day of their marriage.

What distinguishes these unique relationships from so many others wherein apathy and even hatred sometimes replace love? The TV, newspapers and crime novels are full of stories where love turned to hate and one spouse killed another. Can we blame time? Does familiarity breed contempt? Do we simply get tired of people like we get tired of the same old song repeatedly heard? I want to say no! Let’s not blame time. If we must find something to blame, perhaps we must start with ourselves. Time can age all things and cause them to decay and rot. Time also allows all things to be renewed, repaired and restored.

What happens if we don’t renew ourselves and our relationships? Of course, they just get older and not better. They may rot from within. Think about yourself today. Are you renewing, repairing or restoring yourself? Or are you just getting older and decaying? We can make a choice. We cannot turn the clock back but we can move forward with it.

We can keep our love young and vital by making an effort each day to give our loved ones the care and nurturing that will lead to Forever and a Day being real and more than just words.  The Velveteen Rabbit became real and not just a stuffed fake animal.  Make your love real.  It takes effort but it is worth it.

Forever and A Day, Always, by Jewel

Time lines are an interesting way of looking at life or the history of anything. I frequently use the idea to have my students introduce themselves in class. They create a time line of their life and then present it to other students. You simply put a zero at one end of a line, the present date at the other and fill it in with the most memorable points of your life. It certainly takes more time to do when you are 80 than when you are 18, but the degree of complexity depends on how many memorable events fit in between the beginning of your life and the present date. Different people will think different events are memorable.

It is often interesting to see what we think are the most memorable events. Among the younger students, one event is often “getting their first car.” As students age, it is getting married or having their first child. As we get older, the status things seem to take over, like jobs and promotions and finally it seems to become things like travel and places visited. I sometimes do mine when my students are doing theirs and over the past few years, I have noticed that my most “memorable events” are changing. Getting my Ph.D. which once seemed very memorable no longer seems so. Publishing my first book, does not rank up their anymore either. Doing a timeline reminds me of a charm bracelet. At first, you have few things to put on the bracelet, but after collecting more and more charms, you eventually run out of space.

Time lines are an economical way to look at your life. In a way, they are like a fast scrapbook of your life. Have you ever done a time line of your life? What would your time line look like? Take a piece of paper today and do your own time line. What are the most memorable events of your life? What time line would you like presented at a special ceremony if you were the guest of honor?

Here is your chance to do one.  If you would like to share, please post it in the comments section.