The Seven Categories of Morons

morons

There is an epidemic sweeping America.  It is an epidemic of stupidity, naivete and short-sightedness. It has infected between 25 to 40 percent of the American people.  Higher numbers can be found in some sub-groups which seem particularly vulnerable.  I call this disease “Moronitus.”  You may well ask where I get my numbers from.  The bottom figure for this disease (25%) is the number of people who voted for Trump.  The top figure is the number of Americans who in the last Pew Poll gave Trump a high approval rating.  I mention some sub-groups have even more Morons.  This would include the Republican Party with 73% of its members approving of Trump and certainly groups like the KKK, neo-Nazis, neo-Confederates and other Alt-Right groups which no doubt are almost 100 percent infected by Moronitus.

You may think you know what a moron is, but I doubt it.  The conventional definition of a Moron has to do with intelligence.  This is wrong.  Intelligence is a passé and incorrect means of identifying someone suffering from Moronitus.  IQ has nothing to do with being a moron.  Let me clarify this.

Morons can be highly intelligent.  Morons can be rich.  Morons can be good people who love their family and give money to charities.  Morons can be lawyers, teachers, judges, blue collar or white-collar workers.  Morons can hold high and low positions in our societies.  Morons can be greedy, or they can be generous.  What then is a Moron?

Well, first, a Moron is a person suffering from Moronitus.  Of course, that is a circular definition.  More definitively, a moron is a person who believes something without thinking.  The three major symptoms of Moronitus are:

  1. A belief in something without any substantive facts or evidence.
  2. A belief in something simply because someone told you it was true.
  3. An unwillingness to change a belief when confronted by overwhelming facts or data.

Those who suffer from the disease of Moronitus tend to fall into seven major categories.  There are several other categories, but a clear majority of Morons can be found in the seven categories I am going to describe.  Many of the people suffering from Moronitus will be found in more than one category.  Some of the other categories I might mention that have many Morons would include:

  • Those who believe that guns deter crime
  • Those who believe that throwing money at social problems will improve things
  • Those who believe that the more military/police we have the safer we will be
  • Those who believe that all criminals or people who break the law should be thrown in jail
  • Those who believe that we can stop people from taking drugs

The categories above would be interesting to explore, but I want to stick to the seven major categories of Morons.  In the remainder of this blog, we will look in more depth at each of the seven categories of Morons or should I say those who suffer from Moronitus.

(A Disclaimer, if you find yourself in one of these categories and are offended — TOUGH SHIT.  The truth may just set you free.  If not, I don’t give a fuck.  If you are my mother, father, sister, brother, aunt, uncle or best friend, a Moron is a Moron.)

The good news is you don’t have to suffer from Moronitus.  It can be overcome.  However, it will require you to exercise your brain.  If you are like so many lazy Americans who can’t get off the couch to get some exercise, exercising your brain might prove to be a very difficult task.  Help can be found to those who really want to overcome the disease.

Here then, are the Seven Categories of Morons:

racists

  1. Racist:

If you believe that some people because of color or ethnicity are either superior or inferior to others, you are a Moron.  If you think that people who look like you are entitled to more privileges than others, you are a Moron.  If you think, that the only thing needed to overcome racism is to forget the past and move on, you are a Moron.

Racism is not a disease.  It is an action of a mind that is warped by Moronitus.  A group of people who either believe all the negative things they read about others or who simply accept malicious intolerance that benefits their tribe at the expense of other tribes.  Racism looks at the world through the opposite of the proverbial “rose colored” glasses.  Racists see everything different than they are as somehow threatening their existence.  The racist wants those who are different than they are to be isolated and destroyed.

religous zealots

  1. Religious Zealot:

If you believe that your GOD is the only God, you are a Moron.  If you think that those who don’t believe in your GOD will be smitten and go to hell, you are a Moron.  If you think that practicing your religion makes you superior to other people, you are a moron.

God save us from the “True Believers” (To use the phrase from Eric Hoffer) because they are willing to destroy everyone and everything in the name of their beliefs.  A True Believer justifies their intolerance and bigotry by the belief that their GOD would want to destroy the “unbelievers.”  A religious zealot or True Believer can belong to any religion.  Catholics, Protestants, Muslims, Jews, Hindus can all be religious zealots.  Look at the world around you and you can see the mayhem caused by these religious zealots.  All in the name of promoting “THEIR GOD.”

climate denying caucus

  1. Anti-Environmentalist or Climate Denier:

If you think that short-term economic gains are more important than long-term environmental planning, you are a Moron.  If you think that humans are not wreaking havoc on the environment with a result of global climatic change, you are a Moron.  If your think that Capitalism will do what’s best for the world if left unregulated, you are a Moron.

I could present all manner of scientific data in the hope of convincing a Moron that climate change and global warming are real and are impacts caused by human mismanagement.  However, if you are a Moron it would not have one iota of impact on your belief system.  Facts, science, evidence and data have absolutely no impact on the thinking of a Moron.  Immediate benefits, opportunism, greed, personal advantage and short-term thinking are the only factors that matter to a Moron.

sexism

  1. Sexist:

If you think that men are superior to women, you are a Moron.  If you think that women exist for the purpose of taking care of and pleasing men, you are a Moron.  If you think that women are too emotional and cannot make good decisions, you are a Moron.

America is not the first, last or only nation to be infected by sexism.  However, to this date, America has not had a woman president.  According to the World Economic Forum (WEF), which, as part of its annual Global Gender Gap Report (2017), ranked almost 150 countries on gender equality, the USA ranked 49th out of 144 countries in terms of gender equality.

We have too many Morons in this country who think women have come far enough or even who feel that women have gone too far.  How many people have rejected the right of women to marry other women or who make jokes about women in non-traditional positions?  The #MeToo Movement has shown the low regard that many men in positions of power have towards women.  Male icons are falling faster than the one can count as women keep coming forward with accusations of abuse and sexual harassment by men in power.  This includes men in high positions in politics, high positions in religious organizations and high positions in corporations.  The adage that “power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely” would certainly seem to apply to the use of power to take advantage of women, children and other men.

trickle down theory

  1. Trickle Down Economist:

If you think that poor people are poor because of bad choices, you are a Moron.  If you think that the best way to help the poor is by helping the rich, you are a Moron.  If you think that a society is better with no rules or regulations to manage income inequality, you are a Moron.

The famous historian and philosopher Henry David Thoreau said that “That government is best which governs least.”  Too many so called “free market supporters” think that this means “No government rules or regulations are needed.”  They seem to conveniently or ignorantly overlook the last word in Thoreau’s quote which is “least.”  Least does not men “none” or not at all.

Adam Smith, known to most students of economics as the Father of Free Market Economics or the invisible hand of the market place (Laissez Faire Theory is beloved by conservatives and those who support the idea of little or no government interference in the market place.  However, a reading of his most important work (The Wealth of Nations) would show that Smith was far from adverse to the role of government in the market.  The following is a list of government activities which Smith noted in his book as appropriate for government.  Keep in mind that when Smith wrote his book, society and the world was a much simpler place than it is now.  One can only wonder how long Smith’s list would be today.

Here is a list of appropriate Government activities taken from Smith’s book “The Wealth of Nations”:

  • The Navigation Acts, blessed by Smith under the assertion that ‘defense, however, is of much more importance than opulence’ (WN464);
  • Sterling marks on plate and stamps on linen and woolen cloth (WN138–9);
  • Enforcement of contracts by a system of justice (WN720);
  • Wages to be paid in money, not goods;
  • Regulations of paper money in banking (WN437);
  • Obligations to build party walls to prevent the spread of fire (WN324);
  • Rights of farmers to send farm produce to the best market (except ‘only in the most urgent necessity’) (WN539);
  • ‘Premiums and other encouragements to advance the linen and woolen industries’ (TMS185);
  • ‘Police’, or preservation of the ‘cleanliness of roads, streets, and to prevent the bad effects of corruption and putrefying substances’;
  • Ensuring the ‘cheapness or plenty [of provisions]’ (LJ6; 331);
  • Patrols by town guards and fire fighters to watch for hazardous accidents (LJ331–2);
  • Erecting and maintaining certain public works and public institutions intended to facilitate commerce (roads, bridges, canals and harbors) (WN723);
  • Coinage and the mint (WN478; 1724);
  • Post office (WN724);
  • Regulation of institutions, such as company structures (joint- stock companies, co-partners, regulated companies and so on) (WN731–58);
  • Temporary monopolies, including copyright and patents, of fixed duration (WN754);
  • Education of youth (‘village schools’, curriculum design and so on) (WN758–89);
  • Education of people of all ages (tythes or land tax) (WN788);
  • Encouragement of ‘the frequency and gaiety of publick diversions’(WN796);
  • The prevention of ‘leprosy or any other loathsome and offensive disease’ from spreading among the population (WN787–88);
  • Encouragement of martial exercises (WN786);
  • Registration of mortgages for land, houses and boats over two tons (WN861, 863);
  • Government restrictions on interest for borrowing (usury laws) to overcome investor ‘stupidity’ (WN356–7);
  • Laws against banks issuing low-denomination promissory notes (WN324);
  • Natural liberty may be breached if individuals ‘endanger the security of the whole society’ (WN324);
  • Limiting ‘free exportation of corn’ only ‘in cases of the most urgent necessity’ (‘dearth’ turning into ‘famine’) (WN539); and
  • Moderate export taxes on wool exports for government revenue (WN879).

The above list is taken from the paper:  What Adam Smith Actually Identified as the Appropriate Roles for 18-century Governments, by Gavin Kennedy

Kennedy has said that

“Smith’s ideas are still not faithfully represented in modern economics….I am skeptical of classical economists claiming to be his ‘intellectual heirs.’  Even today the ‘neo-classical’ perpetuate the myth of the ‘invisible hand’ and ascribe it to the market.  All markets work using visible prices (and cannot work without them!). What then is the role of an invisible hand?  That even Nobel Prize winners repeat the canard of the ‘invisible hand’ is disappointing, to say the least. The Austrian School likewise promotes the myth of the ‘’invisible hand’ which is also disappointing.” — Grasping Reality with Both Hands.

patriotism

  1. The Patriot:

If you think that Americans are somehow superior to other people are that other nations are inferior to the United States, you are a Moron.  If you think that the United States has a right to coerce, interfere with or preach our way of living to other nations, you are a Moron.  If you think that God prefers America to other nations, you are a Moron.

It has been said that “Patriotism is the Last Refuge of a Scoundrel” (Samuel Johnson).  When all thinking fails whether in diplomacy or politics, fall back upon a belief that your country is exceptional or superior to other countries.  You can use this belief as a justification for war, preemptive attacks, embargos, tariffs or undermining the duly elected government of another nation.

Patriotic Zealots have a great deal in common with Religious Zealots.  In the name of their country rather than their God, they believe that they have the right to impose their will and ideas on other people.  My Country is synonymous with MY GOD.  God Bless America and screw the other countries of the world.  God prays for victory for America and defeat for its enemies. We are justified in whatever we do in the world because we are superior.  In the name of patriotism, religious leaders line up to say victory prayers for Americans because we are the “Chosen People.”

trump supporter.jpeg

  1. Trumpists:

If you voted for Trump and still support him, you are a Moron.  If you think that because Trump is rich that he is smarter than other people, you are a Moron.  If you think that Trump cares about the poor, lower classes or common person, you are a Moron.

Trump has according to the Southern Poverty Law Center (America the Trumped) been able to achieve the following in only 1 ½ years of holding office:

  • Promoted White Nationalism
  • Slashed Civil Rights Enforcement
  • Created a Deportation Machine
  • Banned Muslims
  • Attacked Voting Rights
  • Shredded LGBT Protections
  • Encouraged Police Abuses
  • Revived Debtor’s Prisons
  • Undermined Public Education
  • Eroded the Rights of Students with Disabilities

I would add to this list:

  • Sanctioned Sexism towards Women
  • Dismantled Environmental Protections
  • Created Greater Income Inequality
  • Placed the USA in a Position of Lower Esteem with other Nations

There are those supporters who believe that Trump has managed to improve the economy (A myth fostered by those with little or no economic education) and those who believe that Trump has helped restore America’s Stature with the rest of the world, another myth.  In fact, the economic recovery started under President Obama and Trump has merely jumped on its tail end.  As for American stature with the rest of the world, we now have the lowest approval rating in recent American history.

“The survey of opinion in 134 countries showed a record collapse in approval for the US role in the world, from 48% under Obama to 30% after one year of Donald Trump – the lowest level Gallup has recorded since beginning its global leadership poll over a decade ago.”

Trump is an unrepentant liar.  The sad part is that his Moronic Supporters believe everything he says.  Anything he does is viewed by his supporters as being great and wonderful.  Most of his supporters are about as simplistic in their thinking as Trump is in his.  No amount of evidence or facts will change the mind of a Trump supporter. They are the Penultimate Morons.  There has never been a category of Morons in history who are more simplistic and myopic in their thinking than a Trump Supporter.

Well, there you have it.  My Seven Categories of Morons.  I sincerely hope that you did not fall into one of my categories above.  But if you did, there is still hope.  You can overcome the Disease of Moronitus by doing the following:

  1. Question everything
  2. Look for evidence to confirm or disconfirm your opinions
  3. Look for opposing viewpoints
  4. Question authorities
  5. Read

I fear that I may be preaching to the choir here.  If so, please feel free to share this blog with anyone you know who may be suffering from Moronitus.  Good Luck. 

Time for Questions:

Why should we challenge our thinking?  What are the limitations of facts and data?  How do we know who or even what to believe?  How can we change our world for the better?  What difference can we make?  Can we make a difference?

Life is just beginning.

“We are in danger of destroying ourselves by our greed and stupidity.  We cannot remain looking inwards at ourselves on a small and increasingly polluted and overcrowded planet.” — Stephen Hawking

 

 

 

Bumper Sticker Philosophy?

bumper stickersRecently, I was thinking of starting a bumper sticker business.  Bumper stickers can do quite well in terms of bringing in revenue.  They are cheap and inexpensive and everyone has something they want to show off to the world.  If you go to any trade show or convention or some special events like Roller Girls, Star Trek conventions, Comic Cons, you will find lots of different bumper stickers at the various booths.  Someone once told me that bumper stickers (selling for 1 or 2 dollars) were a bread and butter item for them.  “Big expensive items hardly sold, but everyone had a dollar or two for a bumper sticker.”

This got me to thinking.  If I had some good ideas for a bumper sticker and if I sold each one for $1.50 with .50 shipping and handling and if everyone in the world bought just one of my bumper stickers, that would be 3 billion people X $1.50 which = $4.5 billion dollars.  If it kept 1/3 of that as net profit, I would earn $1.5 billion dollars.  I would still not be as rich as Donald Trump but if I could sell just one per year to everyone in the world, it would only take me 6 or so years and I would be wealthier than Donald Trump.  At that point, I could then finally claim “I am great!”  If I lived another 25 years, I might eventually surpass Bill Gates and Warren Buffett in net worth.

my_kid_beat_up_your_honor_student_bumper_sticker-e1425666062414Of course, a great bumper sticker business must start with great ideas that have universal appeal.  You must cater to the masses.  You must have themes that resonate with the common person.  You can’t have bumper stickers that say confusing things like E=MC2 or Circumference= Two x Pi x r.  You must have ideas that are simple to understand and that everyone can relate to.  For example, one classic one that I have seen on many cars is “My Kid Kicked Your Honor Roll Kids Ass.”  This of course expresses the clear concept that it is better to be a bully than be intelligent.  This seems to be an idea that among Trump supporters, Tea Party advocates and many right wing extremists resonates very well.

trump hateOne other example of a great bumper sticker has been around for many years.  It is quite popular and goes:  “God, Guns and Guts Made America Great.”   This bumper sticker shows quite clearly that God loves guns and guts and thus favors Americans who have more guns and guts than any other people in the world.  Statistics prove this fact as it is well known that there are enough guns in the USA for everyone to have at least three guns each for every man, woman and child in the US.   Even as I write, gun manufacturers are working to improve this statistic.   Ruger has a goal of selling two million guns this year and will donate a dollar for every gun sold to the NRA to help promote their goal of selling more guns.  In no time at all, we will have 4 guns for every person in the country, thus helping our nation become even greater than it is.

I would say something about guts, but we all know that Americans don’t run or that the colors on our flag don’t bleed.  It is an American truth that “when the going gets tough, the tough get going.”  What is lesser well known though is that there are now so many obese or “adipose challenged” (see my bumper sticker below) men in America that we are now having more difficulty getting it up, never mind running or getting going anywhere.  Statistics show the following:

  • More than one-third (34.9% or 78.6 million) of U.S. adults are obese. [Read abstract Journal of American Medicine (JAMA)
  • Obesity is higher among middle age adults, 40-59 years old (39.5%) than among younger adults, age 20-39 (30.3%) or adults over 60 or above (35.4%) adults.

funniest_crazy_cool_pictures_of_funny_bumper_sticker_2_20090814_1080511172But what the heck, you can still be fat and send drones and guided missiles to bomb the hell out of other people.  Guts are overrated!  If we can maim and slaughter our enemies, we will still win and that is what counts.  Winning is a common bumper sticker theme and one that I have tried to utilize in the following concepts.  I present these ideas as possibilities for my bumper sticker company.  I am open to other ideas.  Please feel free to share any great ideas you have for bumper stickers.  When my bumper sticker company becomes rich and famous, I will share some of my profits with you so that you can also be “Great” someday.  Thus, without further ado, here are my top ideas for “Great” bumper stickers.

  • My grandkids are smarter than your grandkids
  • Next to my girlfriend, my wife is the prettiest woman in the world
  • Harley Davidson – Made in Japan
  • Growing old sucks!
  • If you’re so rich, why aren’t’ you smart?
  • Free money
  • Sex, sex, sex, that’s all you ever think about!
  • Why do I have to swallow?
  • Trump is a big fat rich ass-hole, but I love him anyway!
  • Egotists rule
  • Not fat, adipose challenged
  • Intellectuals are stupid
  • Salads are for sissies
  • My mother can beat your mother up
  • Where is God hiding?
  • Send a missile, don’t send me!
  • Immigrants don’t belong here
  • Kill a terrorist for Christ
  • Who is John Persico?

funny-bumper-stickers.jpg-620453-Google-Chrome_2014-03-03_12-11-08-OptimizedI am working on other ideas but I thought this would be a good start.   One caveat that must be admitted is that bumper stickers can offend some people; but as they say “You can’t make an omelet without breaking a few eggs.”  Furthermore, the people that buy bumper stickers usually have an innate desire to express themselves in ways that they can’t manage as well verbally.  A truly challenging bumper sticker lets people say things that they could not express as succinctly or eruditely if left to their own linguistic devices.  For instance, the NRA says that “When guns are outlawed only outlaws will have guns.”  Can you imagine the average person making such an eloquent defense of guns and assault rifles with such a short but biting comment?  With one very unique phrase, millions of people have come to believe that they must buy a gun or be at the mercy of the millions of outlaws just lurking out there to rape and pillage their farms and homesteads, steal their cattle and ride off into the sunset with their women.

trump_supporters_bumper_bumper_bumper_stickerA great bumper sticker is an algorithm for self-expression.  Those commie pinko intellectuals who can confuse you with their big words and high sounding concepts don’t stand a chance against a good bumper sticker.  Bumper stickers let the average or even below average person duke it out on a level playing field with a Harvard college professor.  One of my favorite bumper stickers says:  “Just cause you’re so smart and went to school don’t mean you know anything.”  Wow, is that profound or what!  Take that you college Ph.D.’s that think you are so smart.  “My son will kick your graduate son’s ass.”

Time for Questions:

Do you have any favorite bumper stickers?  What do you think makes a good bumper sticker?  Do you ever put bumper stickers on your car?  Why or why not?

Life is just beginning.

“The world’s bumper sticker reads: Life sucks, and then you die. Perhaps Christian bumper stickers should read: Life sucks, but then you find hope and you can’t wait to die.”   ― Ted Dekker

 

 

 

%d bloggers like this: