We have an epidemic of rights today and a drought of responsibility. A number of years ago when I was a first-year teacher I had the following experience. I was teaching at Guadalupe Area Project (GAP), otherwise charitably known as a “dropout school.” It was mostly a school for students who had been kicked out of the St. Paul Public School System for a variety of reasons. The school was started and run by a Sister Giovanni. She was a leader in migrant relations on the West Side of St. Paul. It was a largely Latino community. Many of the residents on the West Side were recent immigrants from Mexico or Central America.
Sister Giovanni believed in giving kids and people a second chance. She started GAP to help students who were displaced from the public school system. We had kids of all types and most were not traditional “school material.” Some were chronic truants, some were chronic troublemakers, some had chronic learning difficulties, some had chronic behavior problems, and some were just lost souls. It was a challenge working with these young folks but one I relished at the time.
One day a young student came to me and complained that he felt that his rights had been violated. At the time, I took any students complaints very seriously particularly when it concerned rights. I listened to his problem and asked him what he wanted me to do about it. He asked if I would intercede on his behalf with Sister Giovanni, who was our principal. I wanted to show the young man that I was concerned and caring and so I agreed to carry his problem to Sister G as she was known. She was feared and loved by almost all students so it did not surprise me that he thought I might have more luck with Sister G than he would have.
I went to Sister G’s office and knocked on her door. She opened it and welcomed me in. We exchanged some pleasantries and she asked me what I needed. I began to explain the issue that the student had brought to me. Sister G listened attentively. When I was done, she smiled and nodded reassuringly. I thought “Great, I have been successful.” She then spoke, “This is your first year teaching right John?” “Yes, it is,” I answered. “Well, I have heard the issue and I may address it later, but I want to give you an important piece of advice now. Students just like the majority of people will always demand their rights, but they seldom demand their responsibilities.” Then, she gave me the philosophy that I have never forgotten. “John,” she continued, “for every right there is always a responsibility.” That was the end of our discussion.
It is now fifty some years later and I see a government under siege by gun toting extremists demanding their first amendment rights. I see citizens screaming their rights to not wear a mask when required by businesses or government offices. I see women and men yelling about their rights to get grades that they believe they deserve or that their children deserve. Everywhere I look it seems some American is on a YouTube video attacking someone because they believe that their rights have been infringed upon.
The people that invaded the US Capital were loudly proclaiming that it was their building. The implication was that they had a right to enter it if they choose to because they owned it. But ownership of property implies a stewardship relationship. If you own property, you have a responsibility to take care of it. The vandals that broke into the Capital destroyed property, stole goods, and even shit on the floors. Is this the way anyone takes care of property that they own?
Rights:
Do most Americans even know what a right is or what it means to have a responsibility? A right is defined by “Webster’s Online” as:
1: qualities (such as adherence to duty or obedience to lawful authority) that together constitute the ideal of moral propriety or merit moral approval.
2: something to which one has a just claim.
In the definition above, the “just claim to something” seems to be the most common usage as it applies to U.S. citizens. A large majority of people think that they deserve something or are entitled to something. We have heard many pundits bemoan the entitlement mentality that is immensely popular today. I believe that the concepts of entitlement, narcissism, and rights weave a peculiar pattern on the psyche of many Americans. The mindset that results is overly sensitive to any behaviors or efforts that impinge on the so-called rights of these Americans.
The Founders of the USA talked about “inalienable rights.” An inalienable right can be defined as, “a right that cannot be restrained or repealed by human laws.” Some examples include the following rights that are deemed as inalienable:
- To act in self-defense.
- To own private property.
- To work and enjoy the fruits of one’s labor.
- To move freely within the county or to another country.
- To worship or refrain from worshipping within a freely chosen religion.
- To be secure in one’s home.
- To think freely.
There is an International Bill of Rights which lists the following rights:
- The right to equality and freedom from discrimination.
- The right to life, liberty, and personal security.
- Freedom from torture and degrading treatment.
- The right to equality before the law.
- The right to a fair trial.
- The right to privacy.
- Freedom of belief and religion.
- Freedom of opinion.
There is even a list of 30 Basic Human Rights. Such lists are impressive if a bit naïve. To say that rights cannot be taken away is ludicrous. Rights hardly existed for many people even through much of the Twentieth Century. Freedom and rights grow out of power. They always have and they always will. Without power, one may claim a right but never have any opportunity to practice it. Government power, military power, police power and personal power all either defend or attack our rights. Some governments giveth rights and some taketh away rights. It is inspiring to think that we have “inalienable rights” but without power, an appeal to our rights is hollow and worthless.
Responsibilities:
“Webster’s Online” defines responsibility as:
1: the quality or state of being responsible: such as
a: moral, legal, or mental accountability
b: RELIABILITY, TRUSTWORTHINESS
2: something for which one is responsible.
Looking at the definition of responsible, I wonder if any of the extremists ever considered the idea of moral or legal accountability? Obviously no more than they thought of the idea of reliability or trustworthiness with the constitution of the laws of the country they profess to love. How ironic, that they were chanting USA, USA, as they attempted to tear down the foundations that America is built on. Nothing is more sacred to American democracy than a free and fair election. However, these fanatics were willing to follow their deluded leader in his attempt to overthrow an election that was certified free and fair by almost every court in the country.
Responsibilities do not grow out of power. Responsibilities are the currency that we use to pay for our rights. Nothing is free in this world. Rights come with a price tag. The price tag is paid for in responsibilities that accrue to our “inalienable” rights. For instance, I have a personal right to swing my hand. However, I also have a responsibility to stop swinging it when it interferes with the mobility of another human being. I can ignore this responsibility, but the consequence can easily be the loss of my own right. In a society we have many laws which become the responsibility of people to obey. In return for this responsibility, personal rights are granted for a wide range of endeavors and activities. This is the quid pro quo of rights and responsibilities.
Another example is my right to my own opinion. I may dislike a particular minority. I may well be prejudiced against another race or ethnic group and believe them to be inferior to my own group. There is no law against prejudice. Nevertheless, we have a responsibility while a member of a multi-cultural society to avoid discrimination against other people and groups.
Discrimination is an overt act and not simply an innate prejudice. A society can tolerate a great deal of latitude when it comes to the stupidity of prejudice, but that latitude disappears when individuals are subjected to harassment and abuse because of the color of their skin.
It is sad that everywhere we look today, individuals in America are clamoring for their rights. Yelling in restaurants, offices, planes, schools, and private businesses that they have rights. Screaming that the constitution gives them the right to do something without any responsibilities. They protest that they are going to contact a lawyer and intend to sue someone since their rights were stolen. None of these people want to recognize much less acknowledge that they have responsibilities. They want their rights, but they do not want to pay the cost of their rights.
Conclusions:
What is the solution to the problem that we are facing today? A poisonous cultural stew of narcissism and entitlement driven by a rights only oriented mentality that thinks they are above responsibilities. I have reached the point in this essay where it would be easy to say, “Sorry, I don’t have the answer.” Or else, I could now list several bromides which may or may not have much effect. I have the following solution which I believe in 100 percent. I doubt that it would be acceptable to Americans as too many people have grown privileged, lazy, and indulgent in this country.
My solution is for a National Required Service (NRS) that starts at the age of 18 for every man and woman in America. Upon finishing high school and before starting college, every American would need to attend the National Required Service. They would have two options. The first option would be to choose between a two-year service or a four-year service. A two-year service would be the minimum. The advantage of a longer service would lie in the educational benefits that would accrue. Serve two years and you would receive two years of financial credit towards any public education institution of your choice in the country including vocational education as well as liberal arts. Choose a four-year tour of service and you would receive four years of financial credit towards the public institution of your desire.
The second choice facing the individual entering the NRS would be which track to join. The NRS would have two tracks. A civilian track would involve services like the Peace Corp or the AmeriCorps. A military track would use the various branches Army, Navy, Coast Guard and Air Force to recruit soldiers from the NRS enrollees.
Students would not go directly into college or the work force from high school. Every 18-year-old youth in this country would have a responsibility to give back to the country that sustained him or her. No one except someone with a severe medical or family emergency would be exempted from this service. No matter how much money you had or how influential your parents were, you would be legally required to attend the NRS. Many enrollees would benefit from a chance to experience life away from home and to grow up some before entering into college or vocational training. They would further benefit by having enough monetary credits to pay for their education or training and not to come away from school in debt for the next twenty years of their lives.
This program would convey rights to millions of youths and also a sense of responsibility. The lingering miasma of entitlement that exists today would be dispelled as American youth learned about their responsibilities to their country. They would be gratified by the role that they played and proud to have served their country. We do not need a war to teach people about service to their country and to help them obtain the pride that so many military people have achieved upon completing their tours of duty.
Faith is number five of my seven essential virtues for leading a happy and successful life. Every Friday I start my day with the following prayer:
I decided that I must first understand what Faith really means. To do this, it is helpful to deconstruct how we think about Faith and how we use the word. I thought about how we use both Trust and Faith in common language. For instance we use trust in English as follows:
I think you can readily see that there is a certain degree of overlap between the two concepts. However, Faith generally seems to convey a more sectarian or theological concept of belief whereas Trust is generally used in more secular terms. Thus, we don’t “trust” God but we have Faith in her. Faith seems to be a term that is not contingent upon any kind of physical or logical proof. We might not trust a person with our money without proof that they are “bonded” or trustworthy, but we would not expect such displays of material evidence when it comes to having Faith in God. So what is the relevance to this in our lives? What good is Faith if we can substitute trust for faith and have more security in the long run?
The answer seems to be (IMHO) that sometimes we can trust without evidence but generally we are better off trusting with some element of surety that can mitigate the risk of our trust being unfounded or mistaken. Whereas, there is little or no evidence that can prove your need or desire to have Faith. You must have Faith like a parent has love for a child. It is unconditional. You have Faith simply because you want to believe. You have Faith because you accept something without conditions. You need no proof or evidence to support your Faith. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? Should you have Faith without proof? What would a life without Faith be like? Would we be safer or happier with less Faith?
Fortunately, the 3.4 percent of respondents have been more than enough to help me keep my Faith. (Should I really need such sustenance if I have Faith?) Yes, I have Faith that my writing is making a difference to the world but alas, I have no proof for the empiricists, the materialists or the skeptics. I have to ask you as well as myself to believe that I am. It is Faith that keeps me motivated. Without Faith, life would appear to be a futile waste of time. Faith helps us to carry on when everything and everyone is saying to quit. The woman in the life raft, the athlete with a severe injury, the parents with a disabled child, the poor fighting hunger, the righteous fighting injustice are all sustained by the power of Faith.
Faith can believe everything
Kindness is number four of my seven essential virtues for leading a happy and successful life. Every Thursday I start my day with the following prayer:
There were few heroes when I was growing up who could measure up to my standards for clear and unemotional thinking. I grew up with a father who demanded toughness. My father’s motto was not to “get even” but to “get one up.” If someone hit me, he taught me to make sure that they would never think of hitting me again. My father was 6’ 4” tall and had been a professional boxer with a 21 and 3 record. He taught me fighting skills at a very young age. My neighborhood taught me to disregard the “rules of boxing” and to fight with whatever I had to win. I could easily protect myself and few people would bother me. Somehow, I became a protector for those kids who were less aggressive and who were picked on by the ever pervasive bullies. I kicked more bullies asses then I can count. I was always proud to help the underdog. Paradoxically, these traits did not make me more compassionate but made me harder and tougher.
Through hardness and toughness I began to forge a wall that nothing could get through. Sentiments, compassion and empathy were increasingly blocked out by my need to be tough and to not take any shit from anyone in the world. Each episode where toughness prevailed was another brick that helped to build my wall higher and higher. I never thought I would get married but after getting my first wife pregnant, I “did the right thing” and married her. It was the manly thing to do. My dad had always taught me to take responsibility for my actions and my baby Chris was a direct result of my actions.
One day we were in a grocery store just before Christmas. An apparently legless man pushing himself along on some kind of a wheeled board was inside the grocery looking for some money. I walked by him with Julie (my first wife) and ignored him. My wife turned back and started to give him some money and I said: “Shit, don’t give him any money, he can probably outrun me. I will bet he is just a fakir.” She gave him the money anyway and replied “What if he is not?” I never forgot that comment. I am not sure why my first wife married me. She once said that she thought all people had feelings and emotions until she married me. We subsequently divorced but I have to say that I probably owe my life to my first wife. She cared for me when I was suicidal and she always looked after me when I was hurt or needed help. Through her, I began to see what compassion and kindness were. This journey has continued with my second wife Karen who is one of the most considerate and most compassionate spouses anyone could have. Every day I learn something about kindness from her.
I disagree with Shaw. I am getting older and I still respect and uphold the values of our Founding Fathers, but I refuse to live in a gated community or allow a homeowner’s association to tell me what color holiday lights to put up. I am not a believer in mincing words but I respect the rights of minorities and anyone else to be referred to as they want to be referred to. I respect the rights of Indians to have their ancestor’s graveyards not dug up for commercial or even academic reasons and I respect their rights not to be depicted as silly mascots for some college team. Trump and his supporters believe the US has become too PC. They blame minorities for this. They would like to live in a land where it is ok to call a Black person a nigger since we call Italians wops and French frogs. A Black person they argue has a double standard or they apply a double standard for Blacks and Whites. The bottom line of all this double talk is not too much PC but a lack of empathy and compassion and kindness towards others.
Yes, there are extremists who want to take Huckleberry Finn out of the library just like there were Popes that knocked the genitals off of statues in Rome. But if you have any empathy or even the slightest understanding of culture and history, you will be less apt to say “My father didn’t own any slaves.” That is a little like replying to a woman who was raped “Well, I did not do it.” To which I can now hear someone replying, “Yes, but no Black people alive today were slaves, so why should they be so upset?” Yes indeed, why should they be so upset? If you are serious about looking at a reason, please regard the following article:
The people that we will remember in our lives and who make the most impact on our lives are not the rich and famous. They are the people who most cared about us and looked after us. They were kind and loving towards us and somehow showed that we meant something to them and to the world. They may have been our fathers or mothers or an aunt or teacher or perhaps a close friend. How much money they had or how successful they were did not make a difference to us. Indeed, what they gave us could not have been purchased by money. Money doesn’t touch us but kindness does.
You may have noticed that many great leaders seem to have had a sort of doppelganger or one who directly opposes their strategies and methods. Martin Luther King had Malcolm X. Sun Yat-sen had Zhang Binglin. Nelson Mandela had Steve Biko.
Memories of the atrocities committed by the British in the 1857 uprising were still prevalent among the Indian population. There were atrocities on both sides, but even after the war was concluded, the British engaged in a number of substantial revenge and retribution attacks against the Indians suspected or known to have supported the uprising.
Perhaps Bose saw the writing on the wall. He is warning his supporters that they may “not see the promised land.” The promised land being independence for India. Nevertheless, they should remain committed to the effort.
My creativity takes a more practical bend. I refinished our Arizona kitchen and bathroom cupboards; made a dress I still haven’t worn and some flannel nightshirts for John to lounge around in as well as knit a bunch of baby sweaters and a couple of shawls to donate to Pilgrim Lutheran in Frederic. We’re enjoying raspberry jam from our wild bushes in the back yard. The summer project was to tackle the bookcase full of photo albums. That included albums from my parents, grandparents, great aunt, John’s albums, and everything I’ve accumulated in more than 50 years. Many bags into the trash, and I’m down to about 10 newly created albums which I will eventually move to AZ. Next summer I’ll start in on the travel pictures from all the places we have visited in the last 35 years.
Our second scenario involves going to church service. At the end of many services, the minister (Do Rabbis and Imams do this?) will wait at the door and greet the outgoing parishioners. Do you?
Our third and final scenario finds us on our ubiquitous freeway system wending our way to some appointment that we will probably be late to if the traffic stays so slow. Do you?
Ladies and Gentlemen. How can you have a government of the people, by the people and for the people when it is a government of the rich by the rich and for the rich? A government of lawyers, political science majors and corporate people. An interlocking network of proponents who have a self-interest that nowhere matches the nature and interests of the general public of America. 
Many of the board members in the rural counties are farmers or laborers or educators who have little or no training in the laws that they are sworn to protect. Thus, they rely heavily on the lawyers that they hire to provide advice and perceived protection from lawsuits. This renders the board members subject to the legal opinion of the lawyer which is quite often at odds to what the public wants. The boards are frequently fearful of a lawsuit (often offered by the lawyer as a possibility) and will forego making an informed decision based on evidence that is presented at the hearings. 
We need less lawyers. Lawyers and lawsuits are destroying America and Democracy. We need leaders with more diversity in education. We need leaders with more ethnic diversity. We need leaders with more gender diversity. We need greater representation that reflects the demographics of America. We need less lawyers. We need more justice and we need more fairness. 
The significance of these orientations cannot be underestimated. For instance, we have seen considerable controversy during the Covid Pandemic concerning masks, social distancing, and the closing of public and private venues such as businesses, restaurants, and religious organizations. Many countries have witnessed protests and even riots challenging restrictions in these areas. Basically, I suspect that research will show that countries higher in Individuality have resisted constraints more than countries that are higher in Collectivism or Group Orientation. 
The Japanese ethic during WWII was one of extreme fanaticism towards the Group Orientation. Few nations had anything even close to the Kamikaze or Banzai attacks that the Japanese army used against their opponents. In these attacks, the individual was expected to die for the good of their country. What differentiated these attacks from other attacks was the wanton disregard for the lives of the soldiers. It was a foregone conclusion that the individual soldier was going to die. Again, we see extreme dysfunction when one element of a dimension is pursued to the detriment of any rational balance.
Aging Capriciously 