Our story starts in a bathroom. Emily is brushing her teeth and thinking about her beloved husband Robert. Emily is 85 years old and Robert is 87 years old. Emily and Robert have had a long life together. Often happy, but often tumultuous with the stress of family, money and work disrupting the natural harmony of things. Through all the ups and downs, their love for each other was the one constant of their lives. Despite all the cliches about true love and being made for each other and all the other tropes one hears about lovers, no two people ever loved each other more than Emily and Robert.
For the past ten years, Emily had been taking care of Robert. After he had his second stroke, Robert needed help to dress and shower each morning. He was no longer able to take care of his house hold chores and he needed help to do the many activities that he had once taken for granted. Robert was a proud man but Emily was also very stubborn and she showed her love for Robert in her dedication to helping him. Robert was appreciative and demonstrated it by doing all he could to minimize the burden for Emily. He never complained and he never forget to say thank you to Emily no matter how many times she helped him.
Emily and Robert had been married for nearly 65 years. They were both in their early twenties when they met in college. It was love at first sight. Their parents wanted them to wait to finish college but after a brief whirlwind romance, they simply eloped. They surprised everyone when they came back to school and finished their college degrees. Robert became an engineer and Emily was a school teacher for many years. The careers they chose suited their personalities. They were known as hard faithful workers. Not once in over forty years did any employer ever have a complaint or problem with either Robert or Emily. After forty-five years, they both chose to retire so they could spend more time together after Robert’s first stroke.
The saddest part of their lives was their inability to have their own children. However, they made up for this by becoming foster parents. Over the course of their years together, they had helped to raise nearly twenty-five foster children. The social service agency responsible for the placements always said that they could not have found two more loving parents. As parents, they were strict with high expectations but they were always fair and compassionate. They 
were loved by all their foster children who often returned home to visit or to simply stop by with a bit of news or something to eat. Robert and Emily could not have loved any children of their own more than they loved their foster children.
Emily continued brushing her teeth and getting ready for bed. The light was off in their bedroom and the bathroom adjoined the bedroom. Emily kept up a running dialogue with Robert about her day and the trip she had taken to visit one of her sick foster children. Robert never answered so Emily just assumed he was reading or perhaps had fallen asleep. Even after all these years, they still slept together. Robert always slept closest to the bathroom door and Emily slept on the other side closest to the window.
Emily finished brushing her teeth and then took her nightly pills. She shut off the bathroom light and started out to the bedroom. The light by Robert’s side of the bed was on and Emily started to say something to Robert when abruptly she stopped. Her eyes fell upon an empty bed that was undisturbed. The sheets and bed covers had not been moved. Emily was surprised and shocked. Where was 
Robert? Suddenly, Emily remembered. Robert had died the previous week and had been buried two days before on Saturday. Tears came to her eyes. What would she do without her Robert? She was all alone now. No one to go to bed with. No one to talk to at night. No one who would regularly listen to her complaints and problems about the world.
Being the survivor of a pair of lovers is a terrible burden. Most of us want to go first. However, neither Emily or Robert had ever wanted to be the first to go for both knew how hard it would be for the other. Sadly, someone must go first. The survivor is left with a vacuum in their life and memories. The vacuum can never be filled and the memories cannot be forgotten. Events that happened many years ago seem like they just happened yesterday and events of a few days past seem like they happened eons ago. Memories do not respect a correlation to physical time.
Emily will die in five years. In between today and her death, she will experience joy, sadness, pain and a certainty that life will once more resume for her and Robert. She believes that somewhere in this vast universe, her atoms and Robert’s atoms will coalesce and the two of them will again be united. As sure as you are reading this story, Robert and Emily will live joyfully ever after in a place where life and death can no longer challenge their happiness.
Time for Questions:
What is love? Have you ever been in love? How do you know? Who was the greatest love of your life? Why? Is there anything more important than love?
Life is just beginning.
“The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It’s a choice you make – not just on your wedding day, but over and over again – and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife.” — Barbara De Angelis
Those who say that I am not important or who ignore me are part of a new generation that values image over substance. The word “frugal” is now associated with cheap and the word “thrifty” is associated with the idea of miserliness. It seems the world of finance is dominated by short-sighted individuals who have forgotten the old values that made this country great. Hard work and prudence were values that resonated among the early pioneers like so many notes in a great symphonic piece.
With hard work, you earned a penny. With prudence, you saved your pennies until they became dollars. In the old days, no one would ever have thrown me away or ignored me when laying in the street. Too many people have forgotten the value that I represent. From early times, there have been people who really understood my value. Even before I was an official U.S. coin, the value of a penny was recognized by some. I regard these people as paragons who really understood the meaning of money. Let me tell you a few of their stories.
Hattie had faith in money. Money requires faith but it is a faith that rests on the good that money can do and not simply how much money one can acquire. Hattie had this kind of faith and it persisted beyond her death.
Samson was the strongest most well-built man on the block. He had muscles chiseled in stone. His muscles had muscles. He stood 6 feet 4 inches tall and did not have an ounce of fat on him. Samson worked out seven days a week, twice each day at the Philistine Gym on Gibeon Street. He worked out before he went to work each morning and after work for two hours each evening.
wanting something more because you can’t have it. Delilah had only one other person she admired, herself. Much like Sampson, she could not pass by a mirror without staring at her reflection and thinking “how beautiful I am.”
Delilah grew more and more desperate in her attempts to get Samson to notice her. Finally, she hit on the idea to simply approach Samson and remark on his wonderful hair. So, one day while he was practicing his dead lifts, she sauntered by and casually remarked on how beautiful his hair was. She proceeded to compliment him on his marvelous muscle definition. She followed up these compliments with the suggestion that they go back to her place after working out and she would cook him a nice microwave dinner and brush his hair. This idea delighted Samson and after working out, they both went to Delilah’s house.
Delilah waited until the night before the World Weightlifting championship. At around midnight, she used the key that Samson hid near his door to let herself into Samson’s apartment. Moving as stealthily as a cat, she entered Samson’s bedroom. Samson was a sound sleeper and he had no inclination of what awaited him. Delilah took the surgical scalpel that she had borrowed from a medical admirer and in one quick slash, she lopped off Samson’s braid. Samson was totally unaware and did not move a muscle. Delilah slipped back out the way she had come and placed Samson’s key back where he hid it.
Once upon a time there was an…
I need to back up a bit as you must understand some mitigating factors. Most people of my generation today have no idea about why mutual sex was abolished. With hind sight, it may seem a little like throwing the baby out with the bath water. However, around the year 2090, war, terrorism and violence had become so common that everyone agreed something must be done about it. A group of the leading thinkers in the world formed a committee to see whether aggression could be stopped. They accepted the fact that most savage and brutal actions were committed by males of the species. Throughout history, men have fought wars over territory, money, power, fame and women. Men were responsible for most murders, robberies, rapes and crimes against women. The committee noted that the underlying drive behind male aggression was a preponderance of the hormone testosterone. A theory was proposed that if something could be done to reduce the amount of male testosterone, a corresponding drop in world violence would take place.
The solution was political rather than biological. The “Birth Act of 2107” decreed that any physical conjoining of men and women was illegal and immoral. The Supreme High Committee decided that since ancient methods of reproduction were now unreliable, the only way that women could have a baby was by artificial insemination. First, a prospective mother would need to file a permit for a license. Once having a license approved (the present birth rate was a critical factor in licensing decisions) a woman could then go to a birth clinic where she would be impregnated using a glass syringe. Male sperm was collected by harvesting willing males who were paid a fee for their production. Collected specimens were then sent to a national sperm bank to be cataloged and eventually matched with appropriate recipients.
Now as you know, life will always produce mutations. Genetic anomalies that defy the common strain of biology. And so, several years ago, a male baby was born with the genes to develop testosterone. His parents were not aware of this fact until he reached his pre-teens at which point his unique physical abilities were more than obvious. Unsure what the repercussions would be, his mother advised him not to tell anyone. His parents assumed that he could quite easily hide his sometimes-awkward condition from his peers and society at large. This strategy worked for many years. During this time, Adam tried to exercise his abilities as discreetly as possible.
As the little boy grew up, he became an even more devout believer in God. Everywhere he went, he saw the hand of God. In the clouds, in nature, in the weather, in the oceans, in good times and in bad times he believed that God was present. The little boy thought how hard God must have to work to try to keep life sustained. Each night he would pray to God that when he grew up, he would be able to help ease God’s work somewhat and do his share to help make the world a better place.
I am not a very sentimental person nor am I one to cling to the past. I decided I would move on with my life. I threw myself into my job and time went by. I had almost forgotten about Leandra when I saw the ad. It was from the Resurrection Android Company. It was the same company that I had purchased my android valet Sam from. Actually, Sam was much more than just a valet. Sam was a third-generation android with some independent powers of decision making. He could decide what to cook each day and he also decided what I should wear for work. He did cleaning, mending and many light repairs around the house. I had bought Sam shortly after Leandra and I were married. Leandra had mentioned that it would be nice to have some help with housekeeping and all. That way she would have more time to spend with me.
Androids of course are not human and they have no empathy or ability to show any emotions. Sam was logical and could be persuasive but he could not show love or compassion. In the ten years since I had purchased Sam, android technology had advanced considerably. Looking at the ad from the company, it appeared that they were now on a 15th generation android that had affective as well as cognitive abilities. The ad claimed that the new android could help replace a loved one both emotionally and physically. By integrating DNA characteristics using a technique called “Assisted human reproduction”, they could capture the exact characteristics of a loved one. All they would need would be some trace or remnant of the deceased or former loved one’s DNA.
That was when the idea occurred to me. I called the customer service line and asked to speak to a representative. I asked her whether it would be possible for me to create a new wife in the exact image of my former wife Leandra. They assured me it was. It would take about six months for the bio-engineering to integrate the mechanical aspects of the droid with the alleles and DNA strands that they could map from a sample of Leandra’s DNA. When the process was completed, I would have an exact physical, mental and emotional copy of Leandra. Even better, she could continue to be programmed and become an even better Leandra. The old Leandra was somewhat boring in bed. The new Leandra could become a wild and wanton partner if that is what I desired.
It did not take long to assemble the new Leandra. I put the lower torso, upper torso and head together in less time than it takes to make a milk shake. She was perfect. She looked just like my old Leandra. When I turned her on, she greeted me and asked, “What will my name be.” I replied “You are Leandra. You are the perfect wife. You will love and obey me always.”
I came home one day from work and Leandra did not greet me at the door. I thought maybe her battery had discharged or that Sam had forgotten to recharge her. I had left strict instructions for Sam to recharge Leandra every day. But, where was Sam? I did not hear him fixing dinner in the kitchen. I went into the kitchen but Sam was not there. Suddenly, I noticed a note on the table. I picked it up. It was from Leandra. She had written: “Gone with Sam, don’t love you anymore. Bye.”
All of my family and relatives attended both of these productions. We are a very close knit family and we wanted to show support for my sister. Six years ago, some of my family had wanted to go to the tattoo parlor with me when I had my first tat. I decided to go by myself. It was something that I felt that I had to do alone. The problem or conundrum I faced was what kind of a tattoo should I get and what part of my anatomy should I get it on? I remember that I had lots of advice on the matter. My father, mother, sister, grandmother, grandfather, aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews and friends all had tons of ideas and suggestions related to both questions.
I received numerous suggestions on the best place to have a tattoo. Some suggested it be placed where I could easily cover it up when I did not want it be seen. Others suggested that it be someplace more visible. Some said to get it on my shoulder or thigh where I could show it off during the warmer summer months while wearing shorts or a tank top. Places like my lower arms would be visible more often but also more difficult to conceal. Another dilemma, where to get my tattoo placed?
With the looming appointment for my tattoo, I had even more pressure now to decide “What was I going to get? What would my first tattoo be? How do I find something truly unique?” I thought about it all week. Every TV show I watched, everything I read, more advice and suggestions from well-meaning advisors but nothing really excited me. I went on the Internet. I went to the library. I looked at tattoo magazines with numerous women and men who had tats. I must have looked at a thousand pictures of different tattoos but still nothing resonated. I did not want any of the tats that I had seen.
Aging Capriciously 