Aging Capriciously

Before you start reading my blog this week, you should understand one thing.  I am smarter than you are, stronger than you are, faster than you are, more disciplined than you are, more educated than you are, wealthier than you are and healthier than you are.

Paradoxically, I am also more humble than you are, more loving than you are, more compassionate than you are, have more friends than you, am better liked than you and have more love for others than you.  Believe me; it is truly hard to be humble when I am SOOOOO superior to you.

If you can stop gagging, you will notice in the first paragraph that my superiorities have to do with having more worldly or physical things than you.  In the second paragraph, I allude to having more of the virtuous or spiritual things than you.  Putting things and virtues together is the paradox.  Can I really be more of everything than you are as well as being more humble, more loving and more compassionate?  What is wrong with this idea?  Look closely, and you will notice the problem.  It is not wealth or health or things and it is not spiritual gifts.  The problem is “More.”   We want more and more and more.  It does not matter whether it is more health or more compassion.  More for the sake of more becomes our guiding principle.  When I have “More” than you, I am better than you.  Culturally, spiritually, or physically, I measure myself by the “more” I have than others have.  I have arrived when I have more.  More money, more clothes, more compassion, more humility becomes our goal in life.  When do we have enough?

In this blog and my next two blogs, I want to look at three areas where “more” causes or leads to substantial problems for us.  I refer to our quest for “more” in each of these areas as an evil of arrogance.  The three arrogancies that lead to disasters for us are:  Cultural Arrogance, Religious Arrogance and Educational Arrogance.  In my blog this week, I would like to address the subject of Cultural Arrogance.  Next week, I will address Religious Arrogance and the following week the subject of Educational Arrogance.  

Let’s start by defining the term arrogance.

: An insulting way of thinking or behaving that comes from believing that you are better, smarter, or more important than other people

Thus, Cultural Arrogance would imply that one believes or acts as though their culture was better than another culture.  E.g. Americans are better than Europeans or Japanese are superior to Chinese.   Here in the USA, we tend to believe that the “American Way of Life” is superior to other ways of pursuing our stated goals of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.  We often act as though Americans only included people from the fifty states.  It would surprise many Americans to know that Mexicans and Canadians and most indigenous people also live in America.  In fact, unless we distinguish North America from South America and Central America, we must also include people from about 22 other countries as Americans.   Time for a caveat!

This blog is going to be about the Cultural Arrogance that I specifically see in the USA.  This is not to say that Cultural Arrogance is not a universal trait.  Sadly, it is and does exist in probably every country and every culture in the world.  Each group thinks their group is better than the other group.  However, since the USA is perhaps the most dominant country in the world today, our attitudes (for better or worse) have far more impact on the world than say the attitudes and biases of people from Belize or Switzerland.  (Perhaps I am being arrogant in assuming this?)

The Cultural Arrogance of the USA may impact the peace and stability of the entire world.  My goal in sharing the negative issues that arise from this arrogance lies in the simple fact that all change starts with awareness.  Awareness precedes choice, choice precedes action and action precedes change.  Unless, we are aware of the attitudes, prejudices, biases and sometime simple minded assumptions we make about other countries and other cultures, we are doomed to keep making major strategic and tactical mistakes when it comes to dealing politically and also militarily with other nations.   Two examples will illustrate the negative impacts of Cultural Arrogance.

The first is funny and trivial.  It is one that has been repeated ad nausea in most college marketing Classes.   General Motors wanted to create a small economy car that would also sell in the Mexican market.  They created the NOVA and tried to sell it south of the border. The car never sold well.   As it turned out, when the experts went to do some market studies they found that the word NOVA in Spanish means “No Go.”  I guess no one wanted to buy a car that “Did not go.”

The second example is much more serious and concerns the Vietnam War.  This war was an unmitigated disaster for both the people in the USA and the people in Vietnam.  Part of our premise for the war was that the Vietnamese would go Communist and ally themselves with the Chinese to take over all of Southeast Asia.   The concept of the “domino effect” was endlessly repeated as a justification for this totally unjustified war.  A few years ago, I watched the documentary “The Fog of War” which was based on a series of interviews with Robert McNamara.  He was Secretary of Defense under Kennedy and Johnson and one of the leading architects of our Vietnamese war strategy.    McNamara was one of the “Brain Trust” that Kennedy appointed to his cabinet based on their accepted intellectual and cognitive abilities.  McNamara was over 80 years old when the “Fog of War” was produced and his comments are made with both the wisdom of age and the advantage of hindsight.  His conclusion was that the war was a total fiasco.  The question which McNamara still could not seem to answer was “Why?”  However, the answer was forthcoming.

McNamara Died Without Finding the Right Equation for the Vietnam War

During McNamara’s meeting with his counterpart in Vietnam, General Vo Nguyen Giap; Giap asked McNamara if he had ever read any Vietnamese History.  McNamara asked why?  To which, Giap replied that if he had, he would have understood that the Vietnamese hated the Chinese and given their history, there is no way they would have allied with the Chinese.  The Communist movement in Vietnam was a national movement for independence and not a movement to dominate Southeast Asia.  Our lack of understanding of the Vietnamese culture led to numerous mistakes in policy and war strategy.

My first professional exposure to the Cultural Arrogance endemic in the USA was in 1981.  I was attending a speech by Dr. Robert Cole at the University of Minnesota sponsored by the Minnesota Society for Training and Development.  Dr. Cole was talking about the Japanese quality effort. Dr. Cole spent seven years studying blue collar workers in Japan and is the author of numerous books on quality and productivity.  Dr. Cole noted that every major trade, scientific and technical journal published in the USA was reprinted in Japan in Japanese.  He asked how many Japanese trade and technical and scientific journals did we think were reprinted in English and available in the USA?  The answer was ZERO!  That’s right!  Not one Japanese article was reprinted in the USA.  Remember, this was 1981 before most Americans realized that the Japanese were already producing higher quality products in many areas then we were in the USA.  We have been working for 30 years now to catch up but the arrogance that led to our export problems has still not abated.

In 1971, I was in a grocery store in Racine, Wisconsin with a Mexican American friend.  We were waiting in the checkout line and when we finally were being rung up; the cashier said to my friend “Oh, I see you are a Puerto Rican.”  My friend simply replied: “No, I am Mexican American” to which the cashier replied “Oh well, Mexican, Puerto Rican, it’s all the same.”  Too many people in the USA still assume that “it’s all the same.”  The only measurement that counts is the standards we use in the USA.  Thus, our jury system is better than others, our government system is better than others, our constitution is better than others, our economic system is better than others, our workers are better than others, our culture is better than others.  These attributes are the heart of arrogance.

We go into Iraq and Afghanistan and because our democracy is “better than their systems” we are going to stay there until we see that the primitive Arabs are now voting regularly and have all the same benefits we do of a fair and impartial election system.  Ignored are the thousands of lobbyists working daily in the USA to subvert our democratic system or the hundreds of examples of cronyism, nepotism, greed and corruption that plague our political system.

Made in America trumps made in any country in the world except when it comes time to buy products and services as cheaply as we can.  We snap up the latest bargains regardless of where they are made in the world.  We used to say “Jap Crap” but we cannot use such phrases anymore since we are now importing low cost high quality products from over one hundred countries in the world.  We probably don’t have enough slang terms to scorn all the countries we buy from:  Polacks, Japs, Gooks, Slopes, Commies, Frogs, Limeys, Dago’s, that’s about all I can think of.  Only 90 more to go and I can denigrate the entire world import economy.

How do we overcome Cultural Arrogance?  This is a question that should concern each and every person in this country.  It is one thing to be proud of your country.  I have often stated that having visited 33 other countries, I have not found another nation I would want to live in. I am proud of my country and proud of my heritage.  However, remember the admonition: “Pride goeth before a fall.”  Hubris has been the downfall of many great leaders and it can be the downfall of a country.

“France, and the whole of Europe have a great culture and an amazing history. Most important thing though is that people there know how to live!  In America they’ve forgotten all about it. I’m afraid that the American culture is a disaster.” — Johnny Depp 

Depp is a highly popular movie star.  He is known throughout the world and his movies are viewed by millions.  He has become somewhat of an icon with his wild portrayals of pirates, Native Americans, vampires, and other interesting characters that many main stream actors would not attempt to portray.   He is a brilliant actor but that does not mean his views are right or that I agree with them.  I used his quote to point out that not everyone thinks the USA has the world’s greatest culture.

“Every aspect of Western culture needs a new code of ethics – a rational ethics – as a precondition of rebirth.”  – Ayn Rand 

Ayn Rand is one of the foundational thinkers of the new conservatives in the USA.  A popular intellectual and proponent of individualistic ethics, she has been outspoken in her criticism of big government and centralized government planning.   It is interesting that many of her followers would probably not realize that she was disgusted with Western ethics and had a strong belief in the need for culture change.

“Preservation of one’s own culture does not require contempt or disrespect for other cultures.” — Cesar Chavez 

Cesar Chavez was an American “Gandhi.”  “Chavez became the best known Latino American civil rights activist, and was strongly supported by the mainstream American labor movement.  His public-relations approach to unionism and aggressive but nonviolent tactics made the farm workers’ struggle a moral cause with nationwide support.” (Wikipedia)  Chavez pursued the idea of respect for others in his strategies to help migrant workers and numerous farm workers achieve decent benefits and wages.  He did not see the need to denigrate other cultures in his efforts to win respect for the predominantly “Latino” farm workers culture.

To Conclude:

We could look at the pros and cons of USA culture through the eyes of thousands of interesting thinkers, intellectuals, celebrities, politicians, radicals, liberals and conservatives.  What would it prove?  Many would strongly support USA culture; some would strongly condemn USA culture. Whether we support or condemn our culture is really unimportant.  Such a discussion actually misses the key point.  The point is that we can be proud of our culture but also recognize that other people are and have good reason to be proud of their cultures.  I have been to 49 states and 33 countries and everywhere I have been, I have seen people, attitudes, habits and behaviors that I found admirable.  I have never been to a place that I thought had NO redeeming value or that was 100 percent condemnable.  I have found good people everywhere I have been and I have found some bad ones.  We need to be more like the famous commentator Will Rogers but instead of never meeting a person we did not like; we need to be able to say “I have never met a culture I did not like.”

Time for Questions:

Do we have to put other cultures down to elevate our own?  Do we respect other cultures when we assume they all want to be “democratic” or capitalistic?   How can we elect politicians who will respect the diversity of nations and other cultures?  Do you teach your children respect for other cultures?  Do you show respect for other cultures in your daily activities?  Do you think living in the USA makes you superior to other people?

Life is just beginning.

“Grandpa, tell me about the good ole days.”  “Why son, when I was your age, we didn’t have kitty litter boxes. We used to have to go outside and dig our own places to poop.  Let me tell you, sometimes the snow was so high that it was up to my stomach.  You young cats have it easy.  Cat litter boxes with scoop-able litter; why in my days, they would laugh us silly for using such things.”   

Grandpa
Tell me ’bout the good old days.
Sometimes it feels like
This world’s gone crazy.
Grandpa, take me back to yesterday,
Where the line between right and wrong
Didn’t seem so hazy. (Lyrics from the Judd’s song)

Every time I get into a discussion with some “old” friends, it always seems that the “good ole day” trumps today and definitely tomorrow.  “Things are so screwed up today, the end of the world is near, government is one big conspiracy, globalism is destroying the world, they’re going to take our guns away, etc., etc., etc.”

“The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.”-  Socrates – 469-399 BC

Even in Socrates day, the world was going to “hell in a hand basket.”

Origin of the phrase “to hell in a hand-basket”

It isn’t at all obvious why ‘hand-basket’ was chosen as the preferred vehicle to convey people to hell. One theory on the origin of the phrase is that derives from the use of hand-baskets in the guillotining method of capital punishment. If Hollywood films are to be believed, the decapitated heads were caught in baskets – the casualty presumably going straight to hell, without passing Go. http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/hell-in-a-handbasket.html

My mother liked to use the phrase “to hell in a hand-basket” and since I doubt I have ever used it in any of my 700 or so blogs, I thought it fitting to use today.  I would not want to be accused of using any hackneyed phrases.  By the way, do you know where the word “hackneyed” came from?  The use of “hackneys” or renting out horse drawn cabs over and over again until they were worn out is one meaning.  The etymology of words is fun and often challenging.  Now there is a word to look up!  What the heck is an “Etymology?”

But I digress; let’s get back to the “good ole days.”  Do you remember how much a pound of butter or a dozen eggs cost in 1930?  Answer:  46.4 cents for the butter and 44.5 cents for the dozen eggs.  So there is factual evidence that things were much better in the “good ole days” than they are now.  Where could you get a pound of butter today for even 50 cents?   Of course, the average American White male lived only to 59.7 years of age and the average American Black male lived only to 47.3 years of age in 1930.  Could it be they were eating too much butter and eggs?  http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0005148.html

Did lovers really fall in love to stay
Stand beside each other come what may
was a promise really something people kept,
Not just something they would say
Did families really bow their heads to pray
Did daddies really never go away
Whoa oh Grandpa,
Tell me ’bout the good old days.  (Lyrics from the Judd’s song)

I suppose though that if the world is really going to end soon, that trumps the price of eggs and butter.  You never had to worry thirty years ago about the world ending, unless of course you were watching the nuclear clock and saw it ticking down to zero during the Cold War between the US and Russia.  I learned the other day from watching “Secrets of the Dead: The Worlds’ Biggest Bomb” that we tested thousands of nuclear devices during our arms war with the Soviets.  It is an absolute miracle that we did not create some kind of a chain reaction and blow the entire world up.  The following figures are from Wikipedia:

United States: 1,054 tests by official count (involving at least 1,151 devices, 331 atmospheric tests), most at Nevada Test Site and the Pacific Proving Grounds in the Marshall Islands, with 10 other tests taking place at various locations in the United States, including Amchitka Alaska, Colorado, Mississippi, and New Mexico (see Nuclear weapons and the United States for details).

Soviet Union: 715 tests (involving 969 devices) by official count, most at Semipalatinsk Test Site and Novaya Zemlya, and a few more at various sites in Russia, Kazakhstan, Turkmenistan, and Ukraine.

Can you imagine the fall out and radiation that we must have put in the air from these tests?  If you look at the Chernobyl, Three Mile Island and Fukushima disasters, the pollutants from these meltdowns is beyond belief!  How much radiation did we treat ourselves to in the “good ole days?”  We are probably still ingesting nuclear particles from those tests today.  What is the half-life of a plutonium or uranium isotope?   I think it is well over 20,000 years for either.

Well, I guess I am digressing again.  I want to focus on the “good ole days.”  I keep getting carried away with side excursions.  Please excuse my inability to focus, but you know for some of us the “good ole days” were not so good.  But I want to be objective about this.  I don’t want to tell you that my “good ole days” actually sucked, but that’s another story.

Most of the “older” people I meet today seem to remember fondly high school sock hops (I never went to any) good ole rock and roll music (I liked opera better) their high school sweetheart (I did not have one) and the astounding feats of athletic prowess that took place on the “good ole” high school gridiron.  Of course, they ruined their knees, thighs, and hips which is why they are now fat and obese and spend most of their time watching TV sports.  “I busted my knee during the big play in my senior year!”  “I was running for the touchdown pass when I was blindsided!”  “I got hit by a 350 lb. lineman from our high school rival during the big game!”

I would be a zillionaire if I had a dollar for every former high school athlete I meet who gives me the “good ole” excuses as to why they are now “proud” couch potatoes.  For most of these guys, the “good ole days” was high school.  Actually, my high school days sucked.  They kept trying to expel me and the cops kept trying to arrest me.  I was lucky to get out of high school with only one serious conviction, but that’s another story.

Let’s get back to the “good ole days.”  Maybe thirty or even one hundred years ago is not far enough back to get to the real “good ole days.”  Maybe we need to go back to the days of the Philistines, or Vikings or Huns?  I bet things were a lot better when there were fewer rules about raping and pillaging and scorched earth efforts.  You know less government regulations.

Grandpa
Everything is changing fast.
We call it progress,
But I just don’t know.
And Grandpa, let’s wonder back into the past,
And paint me a picture of long ago. (Lyrics From the Judd’s song)

You really had “free” enterprise when you simply could take what you want.  I am always perplexed by people that talk about the wonders of free enterprise.  I don’t get too many things free and whenever I go to the local auto repair shop or grocery store, they always seem to have their hand out for a payment.   To me it’s free if I can just take it and not have to pay for it; just like the Vikings and Huns used to do.  Now that was free enterprise.  The “good ole days” at least had more recognition that stealing was not all bad depending on which group you belonged to.  Today, the only people that get away with “free” stealing seem to be the politicians.  It must mean that politicians are more corrupt today than in the “good ole days.”

“It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress.”
― Mark Twain

I have heard it said that “people get the government they deserve.” Perhaps people get the lives they deserve.  How many people would agree that what you reap is what you sow?  We like to blame others for our problems.   That means anyone or anything else we can attach blame to for the problems we now have.  It is easy to blame young people, foreigners, immigrants, political leaders, the president, communists, liberals, conservatives, morons, idiots and others for our problems.  It is much more difficult to find the blame in the mirror image that is reflected when we care to look.  Yes, we get the government we deserve and we probably get the world we deserve.  Thus, my conclusion to finding the “good ole days” is to look closer at your calendar and remember that the day you are looking at today will soon become one of those “good ole days.”

Time for Questions:

Are we living in the good “ole” days or have they become part of a history never to repeat itself?  What were your “good ole days?”  Are you stuck in the past?  Why spend the energy to change anything?  Do you keep looking back or do you keep your eye on the present?  How do you keep moving forward?  Does your world get better and better or simply more tired and worn out?

Life is just beginning.

Since, I first wrote this blog, I have noticed a marked change in President Obama.  He has taken the more difficult path on many issues and I would now rate him much more kindly in terms of his moral courage.  He has faced blatant racism and antagonism from many right wing zealots in this country, but particularly from the so called Republican leadership. Despite the low ratings he often receives, I think posterity will be much more kind to him for his strength and courage in trying to do the right thing for the majority of Americans.  I am proud that I voted for him and would without hesitation vote for him again.  If you still read the rest of my blog, please remember I wrote this blog many months ago and I have witnessed a much more courageous man in office this past several months.

I voted for President Barack Obama in both elections.  I would vote for him again.  I lobbied for him.  I canvassed for him.  I sent funds regularly to support his campaign.  I was pleased that he passed the Affordable Care Act.  However, to date, Obama has demonstrated a lack of “Moral Courage” in his efforts to lead this country.   I have wanted to see him stand up and “kick ass.”  He has failed to do so on numerous occasions.  During his first term, I could forgive him for not closing Guantanamo or for the use of drones in our war against the Taliban.   However, once he was reelected, I expected more gumption and guts on his part.  I repeat myself, but to date all I have seen is a noticeable lack of Moral Courage in his efforts to lead our nation.  His giving in to the war hawks on Syria was the most recent and perhaps most egregious example.  I have no faith in the Democrats since they have repeatedly shown themselves to be moral cowards but I held out more “HOPE” for President Obama.

Moral Courage has been defined in numerous ways.  Some of them suggest a rather trivial approach to the concept.  For instance, someone said that “it takes Moral Courage to pick up litter.”  Perhaps!  However, I think of Moral Courage as more than just “picking up litter.”  A moral is something that has significant ethical relevance.  To be moral, means to be on the side of ethical and legal behavior.  It is not enough to be legal to be moral, you must also be ethical.  Racists, sexists, thieves and those who would deny others their rights are not moral people.

A web definition of the term “Moral” is:

Concerned with the principles of right and wrong behavior and the goodness or badness of human character.  “The moral dimensions of medical intervention”

Synonyms:  virtuous, good, righteous, upright, upstanding, high-minded, principled, honorable, honest, just, noble, incorruptible, scrupulous, respectable, decent, clean-living, law-abiding. 

Moral Courage is at least as much about courage as it is about morality.  It is easy to be moral when no one is challenging your ideas or positions.  It is much more difficult to be moral when you find yourself in the minority.  The term courage implies that one is brave in the face of some threat or risk to their well-being.  The greater the threat, the greater the courage it takes to be moral.  Thus, my definition of Moral Courage is:  Taking an ethical position in the face of a threat to your well-being or life. 

I have been a management consultant since 1986.  I have worked with over thirty companies.  One of my standard cautions to leaders (CEO’s, Presidents, Directors, etc.) was that if you wanted to make real change in your organization you had to risk being a martyr.  No one who undertakes change will gladly be accepted or warmly welcomed by a majority of the population.

“There is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more perilous to conduct, or more uncertain in its success, than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of things.” — Niccolo Machiavelli

Moral Courage is a prerequisite for anyone who will undertake real change.  When Obama was campaigning, he promised real change to Americans.  We can’t blame him for the cowardice of the Democrats or the greed of the Republicans.  We can’t blame him for the partisanship that dominates politics today.  We can’t blame him for the high cost of medical care and the failure of our educational system today.  We can blame him for a lack of Moral Courage. The root causes of the major problems in America today can be found in the thinking that dominates politics and our institutions.  Specifically, we see the following:

1. Short term thinking dominates long-term thinking
2. A failure to see things from a systems perspective
3. Lack of Moral Courage among our leaders.

“We cannot solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them.”  ― Albert Einstein

Since President Obama is the “leader” of this country, the lack of these characteristics in his thinking is the most egregious in terms of assigning blame.  The first two faults we can attribute to his inexperience in politics and his lack of depth in the world of organizational change.  The third fault is a character fault and directly stems from his lack of courage in standing up to his critics and his unwillingness to take risks to change the system.  President Obama has found it easier to go along with the system then risk challenging the system and perhaps becoming a martyr to change.

American history is full of men and women who displayed Moral Courage.  The Founding Fathers, the Abolitionists, Harriet Tubman, the Suffragettes, Abraham Lincoln, Caesar Chavez, Martin Luther King and numerous others are well known to most of you.  All of these people either risked death or censure by their actions.  In many cases, they suffered untold hardships because of their willingness to stand up for what they believed.  When faced with the divergent paths of expedience or risk, they all took the path of risk.  For more information on people who have displayed Moral Courage go to:

http://moralheroes.org/

At this site, you will find numerous examples of individuals demonstrating Moral Courage in the face of risk and threats.

MoralHeroes.org is an ever-growing archive of inspirational men and women throughout our history that have sacrificed for the betterment of others physically, socially, politically, economically, or environmentally.

These acknowledged and unsung heroes have intentionally sacrificed their social standing and location, political or economic gains, or even given their own lives for others.

According to the authors of this site:

A Moral Hero is not a hero of accident or impulse (such as a firefighter in a burning building, or someone jumping in the way of a bus to protect another). A Moral Hero must have intentionally and selflessly upheld a moral virtue, such as kindness, patience, justice, compassion, love, or peace; knowing of the full risks and consequences of their actions. We have seen this in civil rights movements, democracy movements, peace movements and individual acts of kindness. They are not perfect humans, without blemish or errors. They may not have achieved their goal while alive, but they must have made a heroic effort to do so. They may not have spent their entire life as a Hero, or even been popular at all. However, if their single deed is great enough to inspire us to a higher standard of community, then they are a Moral Hero.

President Barack Obama has been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. This is one of the highest honors that can be bestowed on anyone. During the recent crisis over the use of chemical weapons in Syria, his position provoked some to remark that if the USA bombs Syria, Obama should be stripped of his peace prize.  I would second this recommendation.   His initial failure to look for alternatives, his failure to stand up to the war hawks and his failure to consider the United Nations as a potential resource to address the Syrian Crisis all showed a streak of moral cowardice.  Again, I might have attributed this to expedience in his first term, but now that he is closing out his second term, it is a lack of Moral Courage.

I know most Americans are sick of the partisanship in Congress. We are sick and tired of our elected leaders standing up for their party and not for our country.  We have had it with threats of shutdowns and filibusters to prevent anything being changed.  I call President Obama on his failure to demonstrate Moral Courage, but most of our so called leadership demonstrates the same character fault.

Can any of you think of an elected leader who you would nominate as a Moral Hero/Heroine?  I could take up the rest of this blog with the names of elected officials who have broken our trust with unethical acts of greed, lust and self-interest, but the newspapers give you these names on a daily basis.  It would be repetitious to repeat the names of these crooks, cheats and adulterers.  In fact, the only reason to do so might be humorous.  How many of these “immoral” leaders have asked for a “second” chance or found Jesus or committed themselves for “therapy?”   If I robbed a bank, do you think the judge would let me off if I found Jesus or found a good shrink?

These people who we elect have robbed us of more than our money. They have robbed us of the trust that we need in our leaders.  Without trust, we cannot have a great nation.  Ultimately, we trust in God, but on a daily basis, we are forced to trust our leaders to do the right thing and to care more about morals and ethics than to get reelected.  Unfortunately, for the past several years, the evidence shows that we have elected individuals who care more about their egos, their party and their chance to be reelected than they do about their country.

Time for Questions:

Polls repeatedly show a high percentage of Americans are dissatisfied with Congress, then why did we reelect over eighty five percent of them?  What will it take for Americans to say “I have had enough?”  Can we ever expect our elected officials to rise about their parties and to care more about their country?  What do we have to do as citizens to change our system?  Is it true that as Pericles said “The character of a state is determined by the virtues of individual citizens?”  Are we getting the government that we deserve?  What do we need to do to deserve better?”

Life is just beginning.

Perhaps my title reminds you of the Dean Martin song “Memories are Made of This?”  For some reason Dean’s song has relevance to my blog this week but not because of the lyrics but more because of the sentiments.  The actual genesis of my blog begun last night when I was listening to a Christian gospel group called Glory Train.  One of the members (who is a friend of mine) did a number based on “memories’ he had of a friend who passed away several years ago.  The song provoked many memories in my own mind of growing up:  Memories of friends, parents, grandparents, good times and bad times.

I suppose memories can be classified according to some unknown typology or perhaps a hierarchy of memories.  We can have happy memories, sad memories, bittersweet memories, terrifying memories, romantic memories, erotic memories or angry memories.  I leave it to the psychologists to develop the typology or hierarchy.  For now, I am more interested in what provokes memories? Why do we have memories?  Are memories useful or do they keep us mired in the past?  Are we better off forgetting the good and bad times and moving forward?  Perhaps the answers to these questions are really trivial but during my reminisces about the “good old days” or the “bad old days” they don’t seem so trivial to me.

“The difference between false memories and true ones is the same as for jewels: it is always the false ones that look the most real, the most brilliant.” — Salvador Dali

It seems when I am reminiscing that the past is always nostalgic.  Life was easier “back when.”  Friends were truer “back when.”  Love was more compelling “back when.”  Family was more meaningful “back when.”  “Back when” trumps now in most of my memories.  How real is this?  Not very I think, except in the feelings which drip drop from my reminisces.  The past seems to hold the secrets which are somehow lost in the present.  Love, friendship, relationships, happiness, youth beckon; if only I could go “back when,” everything would be okay.  No more suffering, no more strife, no more toil, no more aging.  Peace, bliss and joy would suffuse my daily existence.

“The Greek word for “return” is nostos.  Algos means “suffering.” So nostalgia is the suffering caused by an unappeased yearning to return.” — Milan Kundera

The ghosts of the past are like shadows on the wall.  Mom, dad, grandparents, old friends, old wives, God-parents, fond aunts and uncles, I see vestiges of them flitting here and there.  I hear echoes of old conversations and phases that once dominated the lives we shared together.  I taste the treats and meals that were conspicuous on holidays and special occurrences.  Every memory is pierced with a pain of loss and the sorrow of ending.  The bad times, the bad food, the bad people are all forgotten as my spirit flashes back to a past that has been sanitized by the passage of time.  I sometimes feel like I am living in an old episode of Twilight Zone.  Memories, people, events, stream by as I observe from the sidelines and occasionally grab a passing snapshot with my digital camera.  It records only the good, but the pictures are ethereal and they soon fade away.

“One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.” — Rita Mae Brown

A tragedy of life seems to be that the older we get, the more memories we have.  Young people have fewer memories and thus have the satisfaction of not having to remember the “good old days.”  In fact, try talking to anyone from a younger generation about the good old days and see how long the conversation will last.  Whatever generation you are from, Depression, Greatest, Baby Boomers, Generation X, Generation Y or Millenniums, the newest generation will be the “young” generation and the other generations will be old.  As we age, there are more and more younger generations.  As a Baby Boomer, I have to put up with three other generations and if I live long enough perhaps a fourth.  I feel sorry for anyone born in the early part of the twentieth century who must now have to understand and deal with five or six other generations.

Imagine comparing memories with someone who was born in 1910 or 2001?  Not only do we have very different experiences but we deal with a sort of phenomenological dimension which cannot be translated not matter how many books you read about understanding the “other’ generation.  For instance, my experience and expectations related to war will be totally different from anyone who was born in 1910 or 2001.  War was once seen as rather heroic to some people.  Now we are seeing more resistance and revulsion to war for any reason except for an outright attack.  Imagine the comment that was made by Winston Churchill in a letter to a friend:

“I think a curse should rest on me — because I love this war. I know it’s smashing and shattering the lives of thousands every moment — and yet — I can’t help it — I enjoy every second of it.”  — Winston Churchill

Memories are made by taking the dross out of the past.  What is left are those reminisces which cause the aches in our soul, the hunger for the good old days and the desire to revisit the places and times of our youth.  The good old days, the good old places and the good old people are stripped of the impurities which were once a part of the reality that we lived in.  The memories we have today and that we think of as our past reality are sanitized versions of a life that would not look anything like our current reminisces. The “good old days” were never that good or great or wonderful.  The past is only a stepping stone to the future.  The days of tomorrow will inevitably be better than the days of yesterday.  Just as progress is made by going up, so the future is made by building on the mistakes of the past.  The good old days are yet to come.  One should pine for the future and not the past.  Sadly, the future will all too soon be remembered as the good old days.  “Whence cometh the good New days?”

“Look not mournfully into the past, it comes not back again. Wisely improve the present, it is thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy future without fear and with a manly heart.” — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

We all have memories; some good, some bad and some indifferent. Memories of what might have been or what should have been.  Memories of things left unsaid, events left unheralded and opportunities left unrequited.  Each memory we have is a page in our book of life.  One day our last page will be written. We will then become a memory in somebody else’s book of life.  I used to believe that having no regrets was the best way to live my life.  No regrets, no nostalgia, and no sorrow for the things I did or did not do.  Move on.  As I approach my final years, I am not so sure that I would want no regrets.  For me, regrets are a part of my life.  They are a reminder that I made mistakes, took the wrong paths and seized the wrong opportunities.  They are a reminder of the friends and relatives I did not have enough time for.  They are a reminder that life is much shorter for some of us than others and that no minute or even second should ever be squandered.

There are those who believe in an afterlife. A place where the dead are reunited with their former loved ones. I can see the allure of such a place but alas, I have no firm conviction that one exists.  If indeed it does; what a joyous place it would be.  A place where my mother, father, sister, cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents and so many friends whom I have lost over the years are all alive and well again.  Is it any wonder that so many people want to believe that something else exists after this life?  A heaven or nirvana where new pages can be written but no mistakes can ever be made – a place where no regrets, no sorrows and no unhappiness exist.  I would say “save it for a fairy tale” except that I like many others have a deep wish in my heart that such a place exists.  A place where no such thing as memories, nostalgia or the past will exist.  A place where every moment is spent making the right choices, saying the right things and never needing to have any regrets.

Time for Questions:

What are your favorite memories? How real or accurate do you think these memories are?  Do you let your past stop you from enjoying the present?  Would you go back to the past if you could?  Why?  What do you think the real value of our memories is?

Life is just beginning. 

I have advice from a respected friend who says it is better to be positive than negative.  Generally, I think there is much truth to his comment.  Pessimists, cynics, skeptics, and critics seem to live hard unhappy lives.  Studies show that though optimists may not live as long as pessimists, they live happier lives.  We can look around us and see misery, inhumanity and poverty or we can look around and find kindness, generosity and love.  So why would I write about “man’s inhumanity to man?”  Perhaps I cannot give you a good reason.  Sometimes it just seems so egregious to me and terrible that I feel the need to condemn it.  I can not always have a “Happy Face” in light of the inhumanity that I see displayed by other human beings.

I am not talking about a specific act of cruelty or any one specific act that has recently found its way into the local headlines.  There are all too many such acts that get talked about in bars, coffee shops and at supper time.  I am also not talking about random acts of gratuitous violence.  Those bizarre murders and mayhem that are perpetrated by some warped sadistic mind.   Neither am I talking about the violence you see nightly on TV.  I wish I were.  I could simply write any of these acts off as aberrations and forget them.  Much more sadly, I am talking about our ongoing and seemingly endless ability to inflict cruelty on each other.  I am talking about the many instances of cruelty and mayhem that scream forth from the four corners of the earth yesterday, today and tomorrow.  The violence that never seems to end as each day the sun rises and sets upon the globe.  I am talking about the barrage of meanness that we inflict on each other every single day, 365 days of the year and 24 hours each day. Some days it seems like such depravity will never end and that it is more prevalent than God, love or kindness.

I am thinking about the wars, crusades, holocausts, inquisitions, witch hunts, gangland violence, prostitution, child abuse, genocide, domestic abuse, road rage and torture which stalk our world.   I am thinking about a so called justice system which values retribution over reformation.  An “Eye for an Eye” says the Lord and we go one further and extract two eyes for one and two pounds of flesh for one.  All too often the gore and savageness and mayhem seem to be enjoyed.  I have seen pictures of African Americans burned with charred bodies hanging from trees and crowds standing around smiling and posing for pictures.  I have seen videos of people rampaging in the street and beating innocent bystanders to death while laughing and joking.  I have seen pictures of people mutilating and defiling bodies that they have murdered of people who belonged to a different religion.  The visions of destruction and disaster in this world are all too often punctuated by smiling fiends who seem to extract joy and happiness from the cruelty they inflict on others.

Azucena, the daughter of a Gypsy burnt by a wealthy and powerful Count, is haunted by her duty to avenge her mother. Azucena confesses to her lover that after stealing the Count’s baby she had intended to burn his little son along with her mother, but overwhelmed by the screams and the gruesome scene of her mother’s execution, she became confused and threw her own child into the flames instead.  This plot forms the basis for the opera Il Trovatore by Verdi and from which the following aria is drawn (Aria: Stride la vampa / “The flames are roaring!”).   The aria by Verdi describes the glee and joy on the faces of those watching as Azucena’s mother is thrown on the raging pyre and burned to death.  If you want to hear the aria, (Click on the title), it is much more haunting than the words which have been translated below.

Stride la vampa!

Shrieks the pyre!
The furious throng
rushes to that fire
with a happy guise;
screams of joy
echoing around;
surrounded by ruffians
the woman is brought forward!
Evilness shining
on their horrible faces
by the somber flame
that rises to the sky!
Shrieks the pyre!
The victim comes out
black dressed,
disheveled, barefoot!
A fierce yell
lethal it blares;
the echo resonates
from hill to hill!
Evilness shining
on their horrible faces
by the somber flame
that rises to the sky!  From Il Trovatore by Verdi

I imagine similar scenes took place at the Roman Circus and inquisition not to mention the thousands of lynchings that took place in the USA during the 20^th Century.  It is easy to point the finger at other people, but in many respects, we all participate vicariously in such violence.   Our popular movies and TV shows depict brutishness, gore and revenge that we all tune into daily.   The final scene of most “action adventure” shows is usually an uber-violent showdown between the good “guy” and the bad “guy.”  Iconic movies like Dirty Harry, Death Wish, Rocky and Star Wars are all about catharsis and retribution.  We sit through two hours of these movies waiting for our hero to get his retaliation.  We identify with our heroes/heroines need to get revenge in the most sadistic means possible.

A recent movie by Sylvester Stallone (Bullet to the Head) has a final scene in which the hero (who is a hit-man) faces off against a former Special Forces operative who is now a mercenary.  An ironic turn of events has us rooting for the hit man rather than the former Special Forces man.  The weapons of choice are fire axes which they wield in their battle against each other.  Nothing like chopping up your adversary to get even!  It is rumored that Mr. Stallone is making another “Rocky” movie.

In the famous movie “Runaway Train,” there is a scene of intense violence where our “Hero,” an escaped convict, is beating his friend to death.  A mechanic on the train (played by Rebecca De Mornay) stops the violent beating and says to Jon Voight, “You’re a monster.”  Jon answers “No Worse, a human.”  The final scene in the Runaway Train depicts the revenge and retribution enacted between Voight and his nemesis, the prison commandant.  Again, somewhat ironically, we are cheering for the arch-violent escaped convict against the prison commandment who has, although perhaps overzealous in his job, the legitimacy of the law behind him.  However, retribution and revenge are not about logic or even right and wrong.  There is an animal emotionalism that overtakes us that puts our vaunted logic and cognition on the scrap pile.  Thus, we will even take the “wrong” side to see that revenge is enacted or that “justice” is played out.  Our animal instincts routinely over ride our human instincts.

Herein lays the problem with “humanity.”  We prefer to call this evil emotional and irrational side of us, inhumanity, but as Voight noted, it is nothing less than our humanity.  We are not inhuman; we are simply and truly human.

Inhumanity: Noun

Cruelty, atrocity, brutality, ruthlessness, barbarism, viciousness, heartlessness, unkindness, brutishness, cold-bloodedness, pitilessness, cold-heartedness, hardheartedness, the inhumanity of war.

Have you ever wondered how anyone could pay money to attend a Roman Circus wherein they would watch humans being torn to bits by animals and gladiators?  Have you ever wondered how anyone could enjoy watching someone burn to death at a witch hunt?  Have you ever wondered how anyone could eat popcorn at a lynching?  It is generally hard for most of us to conceive of getting enjoyment from such brutality, at least when we are in our “human” mode.

However, have you ever gone to a football game, mixed martial arts match, karate tournament, hockey game, wrestling match or boxing match?  You can see the same raw animal emotionalism here infusing the crowd as they participate vicariously in the combat.  At all of these so called entertainment events, we suspend our concern for the well-being of others while we obtain vicarious enjoyment derived from watching others getting beaten and pummeled in a pantomime of war and revenge.  Perhaps, years from now our amusement at these events will rank on a par with the satisfaction our ancestors derived from witch burnings and lynchings.  You can argue that these modern events are mostly without the blood and gore of the Roman Circus but that is not always the case and it would probably not discourage anyone from buying tickets to these shows.  In fact, so much the better for ticket sales if some blood and gore and violence does emerge to “spice” up the show.

Man Was Made To Mourn:  A Dirge, by George Burns

“Many and sharp the num’rous ills
Inwoven with our frame!
More pointed still we make ourselves,
Regret, remorse, and shame!
And man, whose heav’n-erected face
The smiles of love adorn, –
Man’s inhumanity to man
Makes countless thousands mourn!

Time for Questions:

Is there a cure for “inhumanity” or more honestly our “humanity?”  Do you get your violence thrills vicariously by watching others commit mayhem?  What need do you think this violence satisfies in people. What can we do to help insure that all people are treated humanely?  What will it take to get rid of our desire for revenge and retribution?  Can you ever see a time when kindness will trump cruelty? Are humans always destined for war and violence?  Did Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed and Moses preach the wrong message?  What would they say about the violence we view almost daily?

Life is just beginning.